Who Do You Love - Dean Ambrose

Chapter 50: Role Playing

"Sweetie, I'm pretty sure you have nothing to worry about," Kelly snorted at me from over the phone and I could practically hear her rolling her eyes at me as I sprawled across the hotel bed lying flat out on my front,

"Why not?"

"Because honey, everybody loves you, I mean I'm pretty sure my own mom loves you more than she loves me, in fact the last week she called me Lauren three times in one morning – ,"

I laughed at her sarcastically,

"No she did not."

"I'm not even kidding."

"Awww, your mom loves me."

From over the line my best friend issued a grunt and then let out a sudden sharp hiss of agony and a long string of expletives that I could only hope weren't aimed at me.

"Fucker, shit, fuck – ,"

"Um, Kel?"

"My child bit me."

"Do I want to know where?"

"Well I'm breastfeeding so take a guess, I swear this kid has it in for my nipples."

I winced and then rolled over onto my back before using my free hand to cup each of my own girls like having to simply hear about it might make them fall off or else shrivel up into my ribcage and hibernate for a while which I knew for a fact that my boyfriend wouldn't like.

Fiancé.

"Ugh – ," I groaned in frustration and there was a pause on the phone,

"Laurie honey are you breastfeeding too? Because if you are you need to fill me in here, unless its Dean in which case you can leave the specifics out."

I snorted in amusement then shuddered at the ickiness of the thought of him suckling milk from my teats, because some things would never make the pages of my sexy notebook and baby play was pretty much at the top of that list besides necrophilia, bestiality and threesomes. I bit back a gag then cleared those thoughts from my head.

"I keep forgetting to call him my fiancé."

"So why is that a problem?"

"Um, because that's what he is."

It seemed a pretty simplistic dilemma so I couldn't really figure where my friend had gotten lost and in return she sighed with an air of long suffering and then gave me the equivalent of a big verbal shrug,

"Okay but I mean it's hardly surprising since you guys have this thing about not telling anyone."

"We can't though," I replied,

"Because of Stephanie and Hunter?"

It had been months since we had referred to the latter as my old man because he had thrown that privilege out of the window when he had sided with the guy who had tried to pin me down and had then made the choice to hound my fiancé like Dean was somehow responsible for our rift and had frankly begun to act like a megalomaniac instead of the man who had helped to give me life.