The love letter and the suicide note

7 days until suicide

"Bear Cub." Astra whispered and gently touched his nose with her finger, smiling, as he mumbled something in his sleep.

He looked cute sleeping.

She leaned forward and kissed his nose gently, smiling again as he smiled tiredly. She didn't know why she just did that, he just looked too cute not to.

"Good morning my Bear Cub." Astra whispered as she leaned her forehead against his.

"Go back to sleep." Orson said quietly as he turned around to face the other way to try and fall back asleep.

"It's almost 12." Astra laughed. "Time to get up."

"I'm tired." He said.

Astra scooted closer and then leaned over him so she could see his face. Her hair hung in front of her face as she leaned over him, so her face was above his, and she saw a small smile form on his lips.

"Bear Cub." She whispered and he opened his eyes. He looked up at her, and she laughed as he gently booped her nose.

"You're upside down." Orson whispered as he lifted his head up to touch her nose with his.

She giggled and gave him an eskimo kiss.

He grabbed her face and pulled her down to him, and she started laughing as he hugged her tightly, pressing her face in his chest, the smell of lavender and bergamot immediately filling her nose.

She loved the way he smelled.

She wanted to stay that way forever, for the rest of the day, but she knew she couldn't. They had to get up.

"Come on, the thing I have planned for today isn't until night time, but we can go to my house." Astra laughed and wrapped her arms around his neck, smiling, when he pressed a soft kiss on her neck. "You can meet Carly. We can watch a movie or play games."

"That sounds nice." Orson said, his voice muffled by her neck, and she giggled as his hot breath tickled her.

"Come on, let's go." Astra tried to pull away from him to get out of bed, but he tightened his grip. Her heart melted at that move, and she tried so hard not to give in and just cuddle with him all day.

"No." He said.

She laughed and tried to push him away, but he shook his head and pulled her closer. She really wanted to stay with him all day, she'd love to, but she knew she had to get back home. She promised Carly she would do something with her today.

She didn't like breaking promises.

"Let go." Astra laughed.

"No." Orson said again, cuddling closer to her.

Astra pressed her lips against his cheek and kissed him softly, smiling, when he smiled.

"As much as I'd love to stay here with you, I promised Carly I'd hangout with her today, and I don't like breaking promises." Astra said, her words a little muffled as her lips were still pressed against his cheek.

"I want you to stay with me." Orson said, shaking his head, and not letting go of her.

"I'm not leaving you, especially after what happened last night." Astra sat up, and Orson let her. Her heart hurt as she thought of what happened the previous night, and she didn't notice the smile that disappeared on his face as she mentioned last night.

"I'm sorry." Orson whispered.

"Hey, it's okay." Astra grabbed his face in her hands and wiped away the couple tears that slid down his cheeks. "It's okay."

"I'm sorry." He said again.

"It's okay. Please don't cry. Hey," she pulled him close to her as he shook his head, tears sliding down his face, "why don't we have some fun with Carly at my house. Maybe that will keep your mind off things."

"Okay." Orson nodded his head.

"Want to go right now or wait a few more minutes?" Astra asked him.

"We can go after I make my tea." Orson sat up.

"Tea? I didn't know you drank tea." Astra smiled at him as she sat up too.

"Lavender tea. I drink it every morning, it helps me relax a little." He admitted. That must be one of the reasons why he always smelled like lavender, along with his soap.

"Is it good?" Astra asked curiously. She had never tried lavender before, and even though she knew it was edible and lots of people ate or drank it, a part of her was still surprised about it.

Orson shrugged.

"Can you make me some too?"

Orson looked over at her and she smiled. 

"Sure." He said.

He reached towards the dresser next to his bed and grabbed a pair of glasses sitting on top of it. He sat up in the bed and put them on before he turned back to Astra and smiled at her.

Astra didn't think he could look even cuter but she smiled at how adorable he looked with his glasses.

"You wear glasses?" She asked him, "I didn't know that."

"Yeah, I rarely wear them." Orson shrugged, "I prefer contacts actually, I'm just too tired this morning to put some in."

Astra didn't say anything, she just stared at him, admiring.

"What? Do they look bad?" Orson asked her.

"Yeah ew no, you look so much better without glasses." Astra teased him, and at first Orson looked offended but when he saw the tiny smile she was trying to hide, he folded his arms.

"Oh my god." He said in his best girly impression of her voice, covering his mouth with his hand in pretend shock. His face went serious and he dropped his hand from his mouth to take his glasses off as he then said, "you look so much better too, when I don't wear my glasses."

Astra gasped when he started laughing.

"That was so rude." She laughed.

"You were rude first." He stuck his tongue out at her.