ironic.

Chapter 3 - Emilia

Emilia

"Emilia" The front door slammed before someone came screaming my name.

I sat up in my bed ready to get up and lock my door when the door swung open and my three friends stood there staring at me in my granny panties and oversized sweatshirt. My hair was greasy, so was my face. I couldn't remember the last time I took a shower, and while I was used to the smell I felt a tinge of embarrassment hoping they couldn't smell me. I was used to my depressive disgusting self, so was Noel, but Tia and Kelly were not used to seeing me in this state. Recently they weren't used to seeing me at all.

"Girl are you good?" Tia's orange aura wasn't affected by the way I looked, not even concern could change the color that surrounded her.

"Yeah just chilling," I avoided eye contact and then looked to Noel for help

"Hey guys let's go to my room, I need help with picking an outfit." She ushered them out, "Take a shower babe. No questions asked, you're coming to dinner with us. No excuses."

"I'm broke Noel"

"I'll pay, don't worry! I got a promotion, we have to celebrate and I need my best friend there"

"Fine" I was so happy for her, I couldn't say no. The guilt would kill me if I lied to get out of this one.

I hopped into the shower, refusing to look at myself in the mirror before rinsing the depression off of me. I hated mirrors, not because of body image or anything. I just don't think the way I see myself is who I look like in the mirror. I never recognized her. I pushed the thoughts aside in my head before getting a wave of nausea in the shower. Choking back the vomit I felt creeping up I finished up and grabbed my towel. I got out of the shower and bent over the toilet. Sure, I may have felt nauseous but positioning myself in front of a toilet always finished the job. No matter how bad I ever need to vomit, if I put my head over the toilet seat it would instantly make me vomit. That's exactly what I did. Noel came into the bathroom, seeing me wrapped in my brown towel flushing my throw up down the toilet.

"You don't have to come if the anxiety is that bad" She looked worried, but she understood it was just nerves. A common occurrence for me.

"No, no. I am coming. We have to celebrate" I said, grabbing my toothbrush, "You have to help me get ready though, I have no idea what to wear."

She smiled and ran to my closet, she grabbed my makeup bag and put together an outfit that I never would have picked out. Not because it was not cute, but because I have no fashion sense and would just choose leggings and a sweatshirt. Once I put the outfit on I looked through my makeup bag. Who knows how expired these products are. I shrugged and put on my makeup, trying to cover up my hereditary dark circles that I sometimes like to enhance with my lifestyle and mental health.

"Ready" I said coming into the living room. The girls smiled

"You look great Emi" Kelly said, with her sweet eyes and her soft smiles. She was peach. Her aura. Such a soft and sweet peach that deserved to be treated with care and comfort. She deserved the world. I did not get to see her often, she was a ballerina and spent her days booked but when we did see her she was always the quiet one. She may be quiet and soft but she sure could get drunk off of her ass. Which was most likely the plan tonight. I support it though, I somewhat wanted to be that person. Someone who was okay with losing control.

"Thanks, where are we going?"

"No idea, Ryan set it all up and is sending an Uber here" Noel deserved that, Ryan maybe wasn't so bad

"And he's bringing friends" Tia smiled and gave a mischievous look to Kelly

"Shut up! No way he knows me well enough to set me up with someone!" Kelly playfully slapped Tias arm.

"It's here! Lets go!" Noel rushed us out of the door and into the Uber

The car ride was anything but silent and I was glad that they did not put me in the front seat with the driver. They were good friends, they did not exclude me when it was easy. Noel actually sat in the front and made sure to turn around and include herself in the conversations about how we expected Ryans friends to be like. Tia and Kelly were having a great time already planning how to turn these men down, swearing there was no way Ryan had good friends. They were especially disgusted when I told them about the 2% sitting in our fridge thanks to Ryan.

We arrived at the hole in the wall bar. This was perfect for Noel, and for me honestly. I hated large crowds and Noel loved lowkey places she could discover and review on Yelp later. I'd never met Ryan but she spoke highly about him, and based on what I knew, he was a milk lover that listened - at least he listens to her. The place was beautiful on the inside, small and comforting with string lights and little waterfalls around the perimeters. Koi fish swam in a pond in the far right which was beautiful but I felt bad for them, the restaurant served sushi. How ironic to have fish in a place that serves fish for people to eat.

Ryan greeted Noel and we all met him properly. He was yellow, and while it complimented the pink of Noel it was almost overbearing. He was loud and happy, maybe that was a good thing. It did not suit what she really needed in life but she seemed happy, so I would watch her be happy and beat his ass if anything she did not like happened. Ryan's friends were calmer than he was, more adult like than he came off as. Josh was a skyblue that I could tell Kelly was drawn to, it made sense. They hit it off well, softly discussing over drinks and ordering mochi ice cream to share. They complimented each other so beautifully, sky blue and soft peach. I was almost envious of the perfect vibe they created together but I knew better than that, I should be happy for her. Kelly never had that before, neither did I, but she never seemed so comfortable with someone of the opposite sex. Their faces didn't stopped smiling at each other the entire night and little blushes were exchanged.

After everyone ate, most paired up and found little spots in the restaurant to order dessert or drinks and chat. Noel and Ryan took shots, Kelly and Josh enjoyed their twelfth mochi flavor, and Tia and Chad were not having a civil discussion at all. Tia seemed like she wanted to yell at Chad, I was guessing that they were discussing politics. I sat on the bench over by the koi pond and watched the three fish swim together. The pond seemed so small, they were definitely large but swimming in circles. My heart hurt for them and in a way I understood the repetitive motions of their lives trapped in that tiny make-shift pond.

I felt someone sit down next to me on this not exactly sharing size bench. He was taking off his coat and breathing a little heavy. Under his coat were scrubs accompanied by tennis shoes. When I looked up at him I saw green. Not olive or sage, not lime or neon. But the perfect shade of green. Not too bright of yellow and not too cold of blue. Green was such a calming color, everyone says that blue is calming but in my eyes green is a comforting breath of fresh air. Blue can sometimes be too cold and lonely, but with yellow added, green forms. The best of both worlds, calming and welcoming. A neutral and inviting color I was drawn towards. I couldn't stop staring.

"Hi I'm Luca" He smiled and stuck out his hand for me to shake

I took his hand slowly, still unable to pull my eyes away from his smile, "Emilia."