Under the Moonlight

23

I realized something was already happening as I looked at her, something that even I could not prevent as if she was about to board a train... Onwards to somewhere I can't reach.

"I have your poem and the poet's poem."

She gave me a sad smile as we looked at each other at the brink of twilight, I am still surprised, though I had already expected this to happen.

"Dear..."

I could feel her fear of not wanting to say goodbye.

"You are afraid," I said.

"I am."

With a sad smile, she added:

"Every ending has a beginning, and every beginning will always have its own ending, but what happened in between will stay there, forever."

The words she spoke had stood me still once more, as I felt sorrow from within, something irremediable.

As twilight looms in, both of us had sat down next by the river, gazing at it.

"The moon... It's not shining fully anymore," she said.

"I agree,"

And so while gazing upon it, she suddenly spoke a word that would ultimately surprise me:

"That night, in our descent from the mountain, it's not true."

"What's not true?" I asked.

"The eagerness that I have." 

And she flushed.

"Why?"

"I do not feel the eagerness, though I am grateful as you saw that in me," she said, "at some days, I have felt tired, at some days, I have felt empty, but to find a friend–it has always made me feel great." 

After a brief silence, she spoke once more.

"The stars, they do indeed shine for us."

Somewhere inside of me sensed a gap in between us, as I wondered how she'd go home, somewhere so far away and up above where we were.

"What made you want to go home? At the very exact time as I plan to?"

"Somewhere in me have somehow felt the need to go home," she said, "just like the butterfly, it is now my time of solitude."

"I see..."

Even though I had only met her for a few days, I felt as if I'd known her for ages, more than most people I'd known back in my home.

"Isn't it a bit lonely up there?"

"So long as I look at the stars shining upon me, I shall not be lonely."

"The butterfly..." I said to myself.

"So long as I look at the planet below me, I shall not be lonely."

"The flower..." I said to myself.

"So long as I do not forget, I shall not be lonely," she said. "People forget."

"Oh dear," I said, "I know all too well that I shall miss you."

Without plight stopping her, she went on with her words.

"For better or worse, I will have to come back home... The moon, my home, misses me."

"Oh, how I wish I could be by your side again."

"So long as you do not forget, I will always be there."

And she giggled.

"Just like what the butterfly had told me, even when destiny sets us apart, the stars will always be there to remind us of forever."

I then looked up above the stars, at the endless expanse of the heavens above, and somehow I've come to a point where I agree with her.

"They do, don't they?" She asked me.

"I couldn't agree more," I said

She laughed once again, then she became serious.

"If you must, don't come looking for me tonight."

"Why is that?"

"It is not worth the trouble for you to come looking for me. I shall suffer in my own solitude."

But she was worried; her aura made me feel as if she was pushing me away from the plight she was in, the sorrow she was feeling. 

"You are afraid... I know that."

And she fell silent.

I didn't see her leave that night. She ran away from me without saying anything. As I walked towards the bright light deep into the forest far from the river, I had finally caught up to her.

She looked behind me and said with such delight:

"You are here!"

And with the look of delight came contempt.

"I told you not to come looking for me."

I said nothing as I slowly approached her, surrounded by the bright white light.

"It is painful in here, you will suffer as if you have touched the thorns of flowers trying to pick one."

I remained silent as I neared her in the center of the light.

"But much like the flowers, they are lovely and attractive."

I stopped approaching her as I stood in front, looking at her, a few feet apart from one another.

The girl made another effort despite feeling discouraged:

"They always attract those who are intrigued enough to appreciate their existence– for the scent they emanate and the color they offer."

I said nothing.

"But like my flower and my butterfly, this light too shall dissipate."

My tears began to fall as I stood there and said nothing, frightened of what was to come.

"Soon, I shall be one with the cosmos and my home, the brightest there is in the night sky."

I said nothing.

"And while I'm up there, you will always remember me, and I'll remember you too as I look below."

I said nothing.

"And if you can't see me, there will always be the stars shining for us."

She sat down as soon as she stopped talking, afraid, then she said again:

"I've waited for forever, and I'm glad you made the last of it worthwhile.

She stared at me as she tilted her head and smiled one final time before the light around us shone brightly, and together with her, vanished into thin air as everything else went back to the way it was.