The Stranger Laying Beside Me ✓

The Truth Hurts

"So, what do you think it's going to be?" I ask Hayley as we all sit down at the table after Robbie and I get back from the doctor's appointment. The twins had cooperated, and we actually knew what we were having.

"I want two girls." She said, and Aurora shook her head in agreement. I let out a laugh.

"Well, let's just keep our fingers crossed then." I say as they pass out the plates while Robbie walks around and hands everyone a cupcake.

"Now, only 2 of the cupcakes have the filling inside them that says if it's a boy or a girl. And Alex and Hayley, you both have those. The rest of us just have normal cupcakes." Robbie explains before getting out his phone and pressing record. "Ok, you can go ahead and bite into your cupcake now."

Hayley and Alex look at each other and smile before each taking huge bites out of their cupcakes. They pull them back and immediately Hayley starts whining. "I don't want another boy. Alex is enough." I see tears start to form in the corner of her eyes before Alex, ever the little gentleman, turns his cupcake towards Hayley to reveal to her the pink frosting that's inside his cupcake.

"You ok now?" I ask, rolling my eyes when she starts running around the house screaming about a sister. We turn to look at Alex who's inspecting the cupcakes.

"What are you thinking?" Robbie asks him.

"I wanted 2 boys. But if you both are happy, I guess that's fine." He says with a little pout. Before we could respond, a loud bang is heard at the door.

"Not again." I mumble under my breath as I go to open the door. I let out a deep sigh when I see 2 uniformed cops at my door. "Can I help you with something officers?" I ask as I hear all 3 kids come run up behind me.

"Yeah. We're looking for Robert Pronge."

I relax slightly when I feel Robbie slide up next to me. "What seems to be the problem officers?"

"We're here to inform you that your ex-wife, Megan Perry's body was found washed up on the riverbank two counties over. It appears that she's been dead for a while."

I turn to Robbie, concern and worry etched all over my face. I thought we had been more careful than that. And then I looked down and I saw Alex. "Can we maybe talk about this outside?" I ask, ushering the kids away from the door before joining the officers and Robbie on the porch and shutting the door. "Seriously? We have kids in there! One of whom it's his mother you're talking about. Have some decency."

"Sorry ma'am. We're just trying to do our job. Had you seen Miss Perry recently?"

"Not since we ran into them at the waterpark about a month ago. We weren't even aware she was in the state prior to that. She dropped off Alex at the end of the last school year and we hadn't heard from her since." Robbie explains. "I do know that she was seeing someone new. Wesley Morris. Haven't seen him that day at the waterpark either." He adds.

I watch as one of the cops writes it down in his little flipbook before they all nod at each other. "Later today or tomorrow I'm going to need you to come down to effectively ID the body and gather her effects that we found with her." They inform us before walking away from the front porch and back to their patrol cars.

I wait until they're halfway down the block before releasing the breath I hadn't realized I had been holding for so long. "That was too close." I whisper as we stand on the stoop a little while longer. "Maybe it's finally time to seriously consider moving?" I ask, looking up at him.

"Probably for the best." He agrees before leading me back inside.

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That night, at bedtime, the girls went down no problems. We step inside Alex's room and he's lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. "What's wrong bud?" I ask him quietly as I come to sit on the foot of the bed.

"She's really gone?" he asks, his voice quiet and shaky, like he's about to start crying.

"It seems like it. We won't know for sure it's her until tomorrow." I tell him, wincing internally at the very big white lie I'm telling this poor kid.

"I wasn't really missing her, but I kinda always expected her to come back at some point. That she would realize that she missed me too much and be there, ready to take me home for pizza nights." Well, fuck. If I wasn't feeling guilty before, listening to this sure did get the job done well.

My eyes mist up and Alex looks at me, concerned. "I love you though Mama Miley. And I love being here with you." He says before wrapping his little arms around my neck. Oh kid, if only you knew exactly what I had done, you wouldn't be here, trying to comfort me. But I accept his hug, squeezing him just a little too tight as I sought forgiveness from some, any, higher power for being the reason behind this little boy's hurt. Even if he didn't know it was me.

I leave the room for Robbie to finish Alex's night-time routine with him, the guilt eating me alive. I go to our room, and without turning on the lights, strip down to my top and panties and crawl into bed, bringing the covers up and over my head in an attempt to drown out the sounds of my crying.

I'm not sure how long I'm like this before I hear the door open and Robbie come in, flipping on the lights as he does. I quickly try to hide the fact that I've been crying, wiping my eyes and nose in an attempt to look normal. "I know you were in here crying Toots. I could hear you crying from the hallway. What's wrong?"

"How do you do it? Live with the guilt, the guilt of taking away someone's dad, son, mother, daughter? It's suffocating, and it's pulling me under." I say, trying to catch my breath but it feels like no matter how hard I try, I can't get one deep enough to completely fill my lungs.

"It's just a part of this. You reconcile that if you hadn't, they would have gone forward with this information that would've put you and me away, the kids in foster homes, and you decide that that reason is good enough that you can sleep at night."

I turn and look at him in the eye. "We are done. No more."

"It's over. The stereotypical apple pie life from now on."