I found myself

I'm alone

I found myself laying on my bed listening to Jo cry, I found myself laying on my bed staring at the blank ceiling, I found myself listening to mother screaming for me to come wash the dishes, I heard my mother screaming "Gretl, get your lazy old bottom down these stairs and wash these damn dishes". I found myself lonely small and I found myself crying, I found myself depressed, I know that nobody cares I get called names at school, I found myself covered in spit balls. I found myself.

The school bus beeps when it arrives at my mothers home. I run out the back so nobody sees me, I've found a secret pass that leads me to a path to school so nobody knows. I don't like school, in fact I absolutely hate school. Although I love to learn, all I ever do is read, but I hate the people at my school they make me feel dark, lonely, I smell like rotten food and spit balls when I arrive back to my mothers home. I only ever talk to my sister Agatha she is the only one who understands me and I only understand her, she has lots of friends but she hates to be at home, because nobody cares. They just don't care.

One day when I was walking home, like usual the brats at my school were chanting 'Gretl oh Gretl why don't you take your hat off are you scared?' I ran away crying because I felt insecure. I have no hair. I am bald. My hair just won't grow. I don't have cancer, it's a disease called meaniomiat, it's very rare. There are no side effects nothing happens but my hair doesn't grow. My mother calls me strange she laughs because I have no hair, she beats me with a stick and if I don't do what she asks she leaves me with no food for weeks. I steal food, I sometimes see my mother sniffing powdered stuff but I don't know what it is, she drinks a lot of beer as well. I am scared of my mother, and when I get scared I run away but I have nowhere to run to.

I haven't seen my sister, Agatha for a month or two because she stays with her friends, our household is abusive but it's strange they only are careful and kind to joe, my little brother they only care for him. I don't see my dad he's always away and he's even more abusive than my mother. I don't leave home because of joe when he turns five my parents will leave him like they did to me and agatha. I will take him away I don't know where but we will find a place even if we end up in foster care or social services I'll do whatever it take, it's up to Agatha to join us