The Redemption of Maximus

Questions-Emily

As I slam the bedroom door behind me I push my back against it as I try to catch my breath and stop the blood rushing to my cheeks. None of this makes sense to me. the situation has already gone so out of control, and I can't seem to grasp my sanity. I know he is a monster; I have seen it. I can't understand for the life of me why my body seems to act this way around.

It's true I'm not a child. I understand what it means to be turned on. At the tender age of twenty-four I should have already gone through what I know so many my age have done several times. Yet here I am in some cabin in the woods, with a man I barely know, and at the first sign of intimacy, I run.

Coward. I feel like such a coward. Would it really be so bad if I had of closed the distance and let his lips touch mine?

The way he was looking at me, I was already feeling the need to feel his lips. I wanted that kiss badly, but my stupid brain just had to join in and ruin the moment. I still have so many questions. Why does he feel so familiar to me? Why do his eyes feel like they know more than he is saying? Can I really believe in this whole mate business? Do I want to believe it?

No. Yes. A part of me wants that connection. To feel like I belong to someone. To be more than just an obligation to someone. To have a true home again.

As my thoughts fly through my mind I hardly even notice when my breathing calms. Lifting my head I look around the bedroom and it is exactly how I remember leaving it this morning. After everything I have been through and learned today, it all seems so distant from the scared girl who slept in this bed. With the way that his presence makes me feel, I have no idea what I want right now.

Walking over to the bed, I run my hand along the silken comforter letting the smoothness calm me. I take a deep breath preparing to do what I do best. To get some answers. Perhaps if I get more of them, I will be able to decide better. I know one thing is for sure. My head won't allow me to leave this place before I do. With my mind made up I take a step toward the door preparing to question a dragon.

As I reach for the nob a knock sounds against the door. The noise has me freezing in my tracks. Not sure how to proceed I end up just staring at the closed door. I was supposed to come to him that way I would stay in control. He wasn't supposed to come knocking. As I ponder on how to take control back in the situation his knock comes a second time. Only these times it's a bit louder.

"Em" I hear him call my name. My breathing picks up again but still I make no move toward the door.

"Look I didn't mean to make you .....uh, well uncomfortable or anything. I...I didn't mean to....no......look I'm sorry. I'm sorry for trying to kiss you" he stutters out.

I drop my hand back to my side and stare at the door. I swear I can almost feel his heat through it. I can hear the indecision in his voice. He really does sound apologetic even when I don't really think he did anything wrong. I just might be able to use this to my advantage. Not giving myself time to change my mind, I open the door so fast I wasn't prepared for the sight of him.

His chocolatey display of goodness causes me to lose my thoughts. In the evening light he somehow looks even better. There seems to be a sheen to his solid muscles that I have noticed before. He is so large he fills the doorway. To make it through he would probably have to turn to the side. He would definitely have to duck. My eyes zero in on his chest.

His pecs are definitely defined. They almost look hard to the touch surrounded by his small, pointed nipple. The tiny lump would probably fir perfect between my teeth. I bet I could bounce a rock of those pecks likes the Rock does the berries.

I am snapped out of my ogling by a low growl. "If you want to touch us mate, all you have to do is ask. No rocks or berries will be necessary" Martell says pushing forward.