{_) A new perspective. (_} Ongoing.

Chapter 3, Lust.

                 I run, I was at my most vulnerable state looking for something, maybe a sign from God himself. I have never been more afraid. I kept running I was alive that's all that mattered.

            I woke up my head ultimately pounding. I hadn't drunk anything the previous night I should've been fine. My head hurt from everything, the pressure, the music, the atmosphere. I got out of bed staying in my Yellowstone hoodie and sporty shorts. I slipped on some slippers heading out of my room to a surprise, my parents. They stood at the counter looking at each other concerned with their matching coffee cups. I cringed at the labels of the cup 'his, hers.' Yuck. My mom looked up with extreme concern. "Viv, we need to talk to you." I sighed as I poured cereal. "Yes?" My mom hesitated until dipping off the bandaid. "We heard what happened last night." As I bit cereal off my spoon I nodded. "Yeah she deserved it she was being an idiot mom!" my mom looked at my dad. "She's not calling for assault charges." My dad finally spoke. "Okay? " Maybe it was my headache or just the aggravating conversation but I just wanted to scream. "We would like you to give her a personal apology, in the sake of keeping our families civil." My mom said this time. I busted out laughing. I finally stopped when I saw they were serious. "Oh you guys weren't kidding?" I wiped tears from my eyes. "Go on Vivian. " I rolled my eyes. Maybe k should apologize punching was a bit far. I got dressed more not "slob like." I decided to walk my way down there a few blocks. The leaves. They fell, the glistened in the sun as pumpkin stands and cider stands were in full swing. I picked up a cup on my way. "Thank you." I went to fish out a dollar for these kids. Someone reached out and placed down their money. "Make that two ciders." Trevor was at my side so close to my face, I was almost enjoying it? No stop it me. I brushed out the thoughts. I walked off Seth the cup fast. He joined at my side. "This is pretty good huh?" I kept my eyes forward as he pestered on. "Alright Viv, stop." I stopped turning sharply. "I saved you last night! And I almost went to jail for assault." He felt bad as I yelled at him. "Pouncing yourself on me and making me take care of you like a child." I turned back around to walk. He grabbed my shoulders. Typical. He wrapped an arm around the side of my neck and the other hand on my hip. I shuttered, this time from temperature. "Chill, I'm sorry I really am. There's nothing you could do she hates your guts." I closed my eyes. "Yeah." I kept walking. "I'm sorry dude okay?" He pleaded at my side. "It's fine I'm here I gotta apologize." He let out a sigh and nodded. "I'll cya." I went up to the door and knocked gently. A bruised faced, teenage girl answered. She scoffed. "God what audacity." She almost shut the door when I stopped it with my hand. "Megan, I'm sorry I punched you." I said blankly almost. She rolled her eyes. "But really you shouldn't have said anything, that secret is-" she interrupted me, "I don't need your sob story." Wow what a shallow little- okay keeping it PG! "You know what the only reason I came over is because my mom and dad asked me to I didn't even want to and I would punch you again and again." I was on the verge of tears at this point. "Jeez Vivian I thought you had self control, crying over nothing." She laughed. "IT WAS'NT NOTHING. WHAT YOU SAID HURT, YOU'RE TO SHALLOW TO UNDERSTAND PAIN, THIS UNBEARABLE GUILT I FEEL EACH DAY THAT MAKES ME WANT TO WRETCH." I walked off in tears. I went into town, my grocery list. With mascara running and sticky tears I persisted. Yes a dramatic sequence but come on.. I put my hand in the pocket of my crimson sweater. My short hair met at its neckline brushing with every breeze. I went into the store stopping in my tracks. I brushed my hair away from my face. He looked at me back. "Roan-" "Viv-" We both said. I laughed a bit. He looked off to the aisle. "Is it true did you and him do anything?" He sighed. I shook my head fast. "He doesn't mean anything to me." A little while later I would figure out Trevor was in here too on the aisle over. "Then can I officially kiss you?" I smiled, a pretty true one for the first time in awhile. He grabbed me and kissed me. Instant sparks tingled. I brushed his hair out of his face. He nodded embarrassed. "Alright well I'm gonna-" He pointed behind him. I nodded laughing. As I shopped we kept bumping into each other and left together. "So what do you really like about this town?" He made eye contact with this question. "Honestly the trails, hiking. Nothing else." He nodded. "You?" I asked wondering about him. "I guess the people, the community." I nodded not understand at all. He was walking me to my house. "You're sly!" I punched him softly in the shoulder. He leaned down and kissed me. "Bye Viv." He smiled. I bit my lip. "Maybe we can uhm make a date or, not a date I mean-" He laughed at my embarrassment. "It's a date somewhere whatever. Friday." I smiled. I reached up and kissed him again. Yuck why did I do that?! Ugh I feel so silly. "Bye." I waved.