Go Away // Sequel to Stubborn (ThatOneTomahawk)

Chapter 7 - Julio

Chapter 7 - 50 Ways to Say Goodbye

Brooke never left my mind. The memories of us always overwhelmed my mind. The day we met, the countless times we Skyped, her face when we surprised her on her birthday...

...kissing under her desk, night swimming...

...losing her.

I told myself to shut the hell up, but I couldn't come to stop thinking about it all. Her beautiful face and the way she laughs; the random faces she makes when she's confused or annoyed.

I love her, and my stupid jealousy and paranoia made me lose her.

I lost her and it's all my fault.

After tweeting random crap, I decided to stream. There was a Badlion FFA that was calling my name, and I needed to distract myself.

Once I started streaming and got full iron, I read off some donations and my jaw tightened when I read a donation from "GrasersBaexo".

"Hey Tomahawk! I was just wondering what ever happened to you and Brooke. All of us fans miss ThatStubbornTomahawk."

I paused, took a deep breath, and continued, "Videos with Brooke aren't possible right now. I wish it was different but it's not. Anyway, the next donation is from LilahJane, and she said..."

After finishing reading the donations, I continued playing the game. PvP was just enabled and people who had been stalked were finally being killed.

By the hour mark, I was jamming to the Plug DJ songs that people were requesting and had half diamond with enchants. I was doing pretty well, only being a heart down.

The next song that played was 50 Ways to Say Goodbye by Train.

"My heart is paralyzed

My head was oversized

I'll take the high road like I should

You said it's meant to be

That it's not you, it's me

You're leaving now for my own good."

I sighed and pretended to enjoy the song, but instead it reminded me of Brooke. Who requested this? Did they know how much I was suffering?

The song continued, talking about excuses the singer of Train would tell his friends as to why his girl was gone. He talked about needing help saying goodbye to her.

My heart hurt and I could barely focus on the game. All I could focus on was Brooke.

"Well guys, I think we should head to the surface now and see if we can get some kills," I began digging up, still overwhelmed.

I turned on my coordinates and began running to 0,0, where I know there was going to be a lot of fighting going on.

And sure enough, there was.

I snuck up behind a guy who had no enchants and took him out quickly. It was a backstab and he didn't have a chance to react, since my sword was diamond with a sharpness 2 enchant.

I was then noticed by a guy with enchants and iron armor. I switched to my bow slot and got two fully drawn shots on him. He started running and he stopped to eat a gapple, but I caught up with him and took him out in a few hits. He brought me down to seven hearts.

I ate a golden apple and crafted two heads. People in the stream chat were cheering me on, as well as the Badlion chat.

I went closer to 0,0 and watched all of the people in full diamond fight. People were being killed all over the place, and there were less than 100 people left.

"So my plan is to sneak up on someone who's low, kill them and run, because I'm a douche," I laughed for the first time all day.

One of the people in full diamond were running away to gapple, so I went up behind him and melee'd him. Once he died, he raged in chat and I laughed.

"Don't be that guy," I said, and then realized that sometimes I'm that guy. Anyone can be that guy at certain times.

"Well, I mean...," I shrugged and continued on.

The guy who was chasing the guy I just killed was approaching me, so I ran away from 0,0 and lost him.

"Full diamond... Hallelujah!" I laughed.

And then I was snuck up on and killed.

"Well... I mean, I guess," I shrugged, a little pissed.

I wrote "gg" in chat and stopped the stream, tired and stressed out of my mind.

I went on TeamSpeak and saw that there was a channel with Brooke, Jordan, Will, Poke, Tofuu, Faith, and... Adele? What is she doing in a channel with Brooke?

I resisted every urge to join and continued on, joining a channel with Graser and H. I fooled around with them for a bit and forgot about things for a little. Thankfully, they didn't question me, which was good.

Yeah, I was distracted for a little while, but the thoughts always come back, harder and harder to manage every time.

-=+=-

This is a filler and I'm soz

I wrote this all in the car on my way to therapy and waiting for therapy to begin

Drama is going to be coming next chapter hopefully if I have my shit together

(This isn't about you guys it's in general bc this is a cube fanfic anyway so) And by the way, if you're going to talk shit about the Cube to me, expect me to go off on you, because their videos are what got me through all of last summer and this school year. They're the reason I'm still alive, and you're calling them "money whores" and saying they only do YouTube for the money? Have you even watched a Graser video? Or seen his Twitter and how he communicates with his friends? They're quality videos that Graser works his butt off making for w lot of his day, when he could be doing other things other than pleasing us. He's a great guy. YouTube doesn't even make you a big income unless you have millions of subs. So don't say they (Graser specifically) do it for money.

Yeah sorry that was a rant

Luv you guys <3

~Kerri xo~