DANCING WITH MYSELF • EDDIE MUNSON

five

Nights were warm and the days were young, and you had fully surrendered yourself to the hypnotic power of David Bowie and his "Golden Years."

(Come get up, my baby)

You lost yourself in the crowd as you swayed to the music and sang aloud. Eyes closed. Hands on your hips, on your face, in your hair, floating into the air. You were no longer on the dance floor. Now you were alone in your bedroom, a child again, dancing freely without a care. (Nothing's gonna touch you in these golden years) You had no sense of self. No sense of shape. You were a mighty waterfall flowing out into forever. You were a majestic bird extending your wings and soaring high into the sky, higher and higher, higher and

"Oof!"

falling hard on your ass.

(Come get up, my baby)

The crowd parted around you like an ebbing wave, making you feel strangely powerful. Eyes that never once noticed you were now staring down at you with concern. Hands reached out. So many hands. Football players. Cheerleaders. Preps. Nerds. Burnouts. The damn student council president, with his Buddy Holly glasses. He bent down next to you, said, "Whoa... you okay?" and you threw your hands over your mouth and started to laugh.

Then the crowd parted again, this time for Chrissy Cunningham. She came stumbling toward you in her teal dress, barely able to stand because she was giggling so much. "Oh my god...! Are you okay?"

You looked up at her and smiled a lopsided smile. "I'm a mess."

Chrissy said, "No, you're perfect... C'mon, honey."

She took your hands and lifted you to your feet, then continued to dance with you, swinging your arms, singing under her breath, "Run for the shadows, run for the shadows / Run for the shadows in these golden years..."

You said, "We're graduating soon."

"I know."

"I'm terrified!"

Chrissy laughed. "I know!"

And you threw your arms around Chrissy's neck and hugged her tight, almost knocking her off balance.

Throughout your life, you had probably hugged Chrissy a thousand times. Hello hugs. Goodbye hugs. Happy hugs. Sad hugs. Hugs that made you fall to pieces and then put you back together again. And it dawned on you now, just now, that soon—much sooner than you'd like—you two would be sharing your last hug. You wouldn't have her to lean on anymore. And that scared the shit out of you.

You mumbled into her shoulder, "You know I love you, right?"

Chrissy smiled. "I know." Then she pulled away and pressed her hand to your forehead, as if checking for a fever. "You're overheated."

"Yeah... I think I'm gonna take a break, go get a drink."

"Okay..." And as you turned to leave, Chrissy gave your backside a little swat and said, "Go ice your ass," making you both break up into giggles again.

You walked off the dance floor feeling exhausted and elated, humming the rest of the song to yourself. Strings of yellow light glistened through the canopy like stars in a cloudy night sky. You stared at them for a minute, breathless, and thought, Yeah... this really is kinda perfect, isn't it?

Then, somewhere, an indistinct sound broke your focus—a cough, a laugh, a tinkle of glass, you weren't sure—but something dragged your eyes away from the dazzling lights and drew your attention to the darkened corner of the room, where Eddie Munson was standing awkwardly next to one of the vine-covered pillars, looking totally out of his element.