All The Good Memories

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Time goes by and it's month since the first day of school. I didn't even know how. My brain couldn't take it. It was just way too fast. It's been a MONTH and I didn't do anything interesting.

I always wanted to have my life full of adventure and adrenaline flowing in my blood. I just love that feeling. When your life is not guaranteed and you just feel free. Nothing can stop you from being yourself.

I once jumped out of plane with a parachute. The feeling of freedom when you're just falling. Noone can take it away from you in that moment. Just a long fall to god knows where. You're looking at the ground and you can't think about absolutely anything, but the wind around you and the ground underneath you.

But that month? I didn't even go outside. I had to do something with that. Outside was something about 15°C. It was early October so it wasn't too hot and not cold. It was just perfect.

Autumn is my favourite season. I don't know why but I just love the energy of it. All the leaves are orange or yellow. They aren't bright though. It's pretty windy and I just love it.

I thought about it for a while and then I got the idea. A lake wasn't far from my house.

It was Saturday so I didn't have school and I finished all my homework. 'Okay, time to get out of bed' I thought. And it really was. It was 1:36pm. So I got out of bed and went to kitchen when I saw my mum standing there and cooking something.

"Good morning!" I said in a morning, raspy voice.

"Good morning sweetie! Do you want some eggs?" She asked revealing what she was cooking.

"No, thanks. I'm not hungry." I said and I didn't lie. I am for some reason not hungry in the morning and she knows it so she just let me be. She's not like my grandma who's asking every 5 minutes if I don't want to eat. But I guess that every grandma is like that.

I went to the living room where were my father and sister. They both said 'good morning ' and laughed at how long did I sleep. But the fact is that I didn't sleep. I never sleep too long. I just lie in the bed and think. Think about absolutely nothing.

I just said that I'm going outside in a while and headed to my room. I just quickly checked socials and started changing. I put the swimsuit on at home because I didn't want to change at the lake. I just put on sweatpants, hoodie and waved bye to parents.

I said that I'm going out with my classmate, because they would have too many questions if I said that I'm going alone.

I took my phone, keys and some money in case that I wanted to buy some drink or something.

I don't know why but I always think forward, but still always forget something. It's annoying.

I walked out of the door and started walking to the lake. It wasn't even far, only like 800 meters.

When I came there I sat at the ground and just watched the water move around. It was beautiful. Of course because it was a lake, there were fish in it that we're just splashing around. Sometimes I think that I'm too dramatic. All these things that I do, it sounds stupid. Surely there is someone out there that does the same.

After a while of just staring at water I stood up and started undressing myself.

When I was only in the swimsuit, I begun to approach the lake. At first, I stepped in the water with just my feet. Then I slowly started walking forward and slowly started  to sink in the water. My feet, tights, waist, chest and shoulders. I was still going deeper and deeper in the lake.

The water was incredibly cold. It felt like it is supposed to turn into ice in any second. But it didn't. And for some reason, I didn't feel the cold. I didn't feel anything. My mind was just blank.