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Taehyung wanted to sob

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Taehyung wanted to sob. He really, truly did.

This was not how Taehyung saw this day starting. This was supposed to be a good day. This was supposed to be the best damn day of his life.

And what happens? A peep show full of penis! Gold star for Kim!

The colossal weight of the situation buckled down on top of him as Taehyung was awarded a near full frontal. And in his panicked, not-so-sane-Kim state, his only reaction was to violently smack his hands over his eyes quickly to avoid the sight.

Taehyung let out an agonised 'OW!' just as his eyes began to protest against the force of his fingers, watering and stinging instantly.

Oh it hurt! So, so much.

"Jesus, Taehyung!"

Paula's song in his brain stopped immediately, being cut off like an old record.

On came Carly Simon's 'You're So Vain', only the lyrics had been replaced with, 'you're so screwed... I bet you thought he wouldn't have caught you, don't you, don't you...'

Just fabulous!

"How long have you been standing there?" Jungkook asked breathlessly.

Long enough to see the evident differences between his grace and your gentleman!

Taehyung thought he had seriously damaged his retinas.

Fearing that he wouldn't exactly appreciate a cheerful, 'Morning, Jungkook! So how are you?', He made a now-blind attempt to get the hell out quickly.

But the tiled floor was slick from the steam of the shower. So in his haste to make a speedy, but still blind, exit, he started to do a one-eighty only to find that his feet could find absolutely no grip. They just kept slipping round and round as he repeatedly chanted his sincerest apologies to Jungkook.

"Taehyung, stop! You'll hurt yourself!"

It all happened so quickly...

Taehyung felt his body arch backwards suddenly; the sensation of freefalling began to tickle its way up his spine as his non-existent balance shifted from the soles of his feet into nothingness.

Taehyung yelped and threw out his hands, no longer able to blink or see properly.

Everything was just a large, stinging blur. Taehyung's hands flailed in a way that he could only describe as cartoonish and he's sure that were Jungkook not the kindly man that he was, he'd be desperate to capture this special Kodak moment on film.

As his hands continued to flap about, Taehyung violently lunged himself forward, desperate to keep himself upright instead of sprawled out on the floor on his ass. He didn't exactly need to add to the embarrassment, after all.

And had his eyes been working, perhaps Taehyung would have seen the solid wood doorframe that was right in front of him. Perhaps if he had seen it, he could have swerved or ducked or something. Perhaps if he had seen it, the embarrassment he was already feeling would have simply stayed at an all time 'humiliated to the point of never being able to look that man in the eye – ever again'.

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