A Day in the Shoes of Drunken Uncle Rick

He's Not Going to Vegas

Rick opened his eyes. Or, at least, he was pretty sure he did. Everything was pure white. He didn't remember life being so... Flashy. He paused and thought. He remembered reading a book that sometimes Germans get dreams like this.
'Yeah, that's it.' He thought to himself. But, oh no! He wasn't German! He's gotta act the part... Or else he'll get kicked out! He had here there was a pretty sure party somewhere around here. Suddenly, Kat appeared in front of him.
"Kat!" He called out, attempting to run towards her, but not moving forward. "Make me a nutritional sandw--" He paused, then corrected himself. "--nutritional sandvich!" Kat just smiled at him, then she started fading away. She then faded into the colours of Wheatley and Emma standing in front of him.
"--king in his sleep..." He then squinted at Wheatley standing overtop of him. That... That wasn't Wheatley! It was Jeremy! He quickly stood up and stared him in the eye.
"YOU KNOW WHAT JEREMY?!" Rick screamed, anger flashing over his face, "I'M NOT GOING TO VEGAS!" He was NOT letting Jeremy convince him to go along with another one of his Vegas schemes!
"Vegas?" Jeremy, but actually Wheatley (not that Rick was aware of), questioned, an obvious look of confusion on his face, "When did I ever mention Veg--" Rick was furious! He grabbed Wheatley's shoulders and screamed in his face,
"IF YOU SAY VEGAS ONE MORE TIME," Rick's voice dropped a bit, "I am getting. Out. Of. This. VAN!" Wheatley jumped back, shoving Rick's hands off of him.
"Jesus--" He stammered, "R-Rick! Calm down, how about we jus--"
"YOU KNOW WHAT?!" He screamed, flailing his arms and stumbling to their front door, "I'M DONE WITH THIS, TAKE ME TO THAT AIRPLANE PLACE!" He demanded, as he fumbled with the doorknob.
"Rick!" He heard Emma scream from behind him, "JUST LEAVE!" Fine! Maybe he will! He's going right now-- Wheatley then spun him around and grabbed his shoulders. "Rick! You-you don't have to go anywhere..." He started, calmly, "You can just go s--"
"I AM NOT GOING TO VEGAS!" Rick screeched, leaving the only way he could. Back through the open window.

lol andrew if you read this u fkn suck