Don't hate me

Characters: Jake and (fem)mc

Genre: Angst with a happy ending💕

Summary: Jake left you in the middle of the night and finally came back after months.    

You are strolling casually in the park, deep in your own thoughts.

It's midnight, and you are once again in your spot in the park walking and looking at the ducks flowing slowly in the water. This sight has always calmed you.

But today it's different. Today is the day you always hated but eventually grew up loving it because of a certain someone. Your birthday. You never liked celebrating your birthday because it always brought back painful memories.

But, when he came into your life, you started loving everything. Even your birthday. You always celebrated it with him.

He changed your life for good. He was like a ray of sunshine in your dark surroundings. He was the only person you ever loved and cared about. The only person who made you smile and appreciate yourself. The only person who was with you in your good and bad even in your worst.

But now everything has changed. He is gone. All the happiness and joy from your life has gone.

He was like a storm that came into your life from nowhere and then disappeared in the shadows.

You are back to your previous life again where no one cared and loved you. You are again in that life where you feel lonely and gloomy every day. You have no one to share your problems with and no one who can provide you with a shoulder to cry when you are sad.

______________________

It was four months ago when you woke up alone in your bed only to find that Jake was gone. All his belongings, his clothes, his computer, his photos, everything was gone.

The only things left were his T-shirt that you wore for the night and the nymos pendant he gave you two years ago when you both started dating. If it weren't for these things you, would have completely gone crazy thinking that it was all just a dream that was too good to be true.

Jake left you alone in the middle of the night without even giving you the slightest hint of his departure. He deleted every contact and chat you had with him. Your digital devices had no trace of him, not even the old-fashioned emojis he used.

It was like, he wanted you to forget about him and move on in your life. But that was never going to happen. You had always loved him and you still do. There's nothing he can do which will make you stop loving him.

_______________________

"I should have known." You murmur to yourself while staring at the pond in front of you. It has started raining now. The water was pouring down heavily. It was like the sky was reflecting your gloomy mood.

"I don't deserve him. I don't deserve happiness."

"Life has hinted to me several times that I don't deserve love and care, and yet I am so stubborn that I run here and there for a bit of affection." You hiss to yourself.

"Put yourself together MC, lamenting won't give you anything. Just accept this life, don't show your emotions, and....and... don't even feel it. Just eat, work and sleep. That's all, no need to do anything more. No need to have feelings. Be numb. You have this life and you can't change it, so better mold yourself into it." You talked to yourself, then went and sat at the corner bench staring at the ground.

"But crying a little remembering the past memories won't harm, right? After this you shouldn't feel any emotion anymore" you ask yourself, more of you order your heart.