Soloists

Part 2 Tomasz #2

I entered the hall, as usual, first. I liked to come here earlier than others and do my warm-up quietly, thoroughly and without distractions. Despite appearances, I was not a slacker, everything I achieved I bought with hard work. I often trained harder than others, staying up in the evenings and breaking nights. Dancing is my life, I always wanted to be on stage. As a child I wanted to sing and supposedly had a talent for it, but when we went with my parents to Spain, where I first saw people dancing in the streets, - it was a revelation. Parents at first did not like the idea of ballet school, but soon they understood that I was good at it and decided to support me. I had a good, loving home, in fact I still do. I was surrounded by great, energetic people, and I enjoyed my work. Sometimes I wondered why I had this constant tingling in my soul, because that's what I would call undiagnosed ADHD, which made me to keep looking for new experiences.

I took out a yeasty bread to eat a little after several circles around the room, I sat down and while eating I stretched. My thoughts took me out of balance at the very first word that popped into my head - "relationship". Because I don't want any relationships, after all. I want to have fun outside of work and one-time affairs were enough for me. To be sure? I remembered what kind of gulp I felt when Marcus said all those things about Blanca. He liked her leash, but I didn't want any leash, and love would put on me not only a leash, but also a muzzle, and for that I would have to sit in a kennel. It made me feel sick. Suddenly this comparison to a dog made me ache with something inside that I would call a soul if I had one. I saw Marcus' happiness and wondered if it was at all possible to enjoy the lack of freedom, at the same time. I asked The Providence if a similar state is also written for me? And suddenly I was reminded of the girl on the train, with whom I was having a good conversation, until I screwed things up by suggesting sex in the toilet Her dark hazel eyes were now peeking in my head, I longed to simply look into them, hold her hands and stroke her black hair. In my imagination, we were sitting on the beach, I cuddled her to me, bliss overwhelmed me.

Fuck! Had I lost my mind? I tried strenuously to push away thoughts that were something completely new to me. Usually when thinking about girls I saw them under me or on top of me, and if there even was a beach, what we were doing was certainly not just cuddling.

This day was the official start of the new season, so pretty quickly the room was filling up with familiar faces, which took me away from my musings. The first to show up were Maiko and Giena.

- How were your "kanikuly", Giena? - I joked, swallowing another bite of the bun.

- I was at my grandfather's place on Lake Baikal. - My face turned dark, vacation at Baikal - that was really something big.

Before I was able to think of any meaningful answer, a whole bunch of friends rolled into the room.

- Hi Tom! - roared James, coming up to me along with Adam and the rest of the guys.

- Hi! - I extended my hand to everyone, without rising from the floor.

- How was your vacation? - Adam asked. - Apparently, you and Marcus were on polish coast?

- Yes. Gdansk, Kolobrzeg, Swinoujscie.... - recounted perfunctorily. - We went around a lot of places. Such a tour of resorts full of chicks.

Everyone started laughing at my elementary school joke,  but I felt much better than I did five minutes ago, during my romantic shit. I shook myself off, as if by the help of a forced shudder I wanted to get rid of something disgusting and I looked in the direction of the door, in which Wiktoria appeared. 

There was silence in the room. She always spread an aura of mystery and dignity around herself. She was a mean bitch to say the least, but she didn't give a damn about that and whenever she entered a room, she acted like a queen. This time was no different. Immediately upon entering Wiktoria's gaze fell on me and from her blue eyes poured out rage, but her face did not move. I led her away with my eyes to the other side of the room, where she stood with her entourage, namely Hailee and Tess, and I wanted to return to the conversation with the boys. Wiktoria, however, while still looking at me, slid the tip of her tongue out from between her lips and licked her lips in such a suggestive manner that I was pretty sure who and how  would unleashed my strange thoughts tonight. I smiled triumphantly, imagining what her tongue would be doing with her tongue, and at that moment I was hit with a bang on the head. In the doorway stood SHE. Yes, Małgorzata. The girl from the train. I stood as if blown away, looking at her, even though at the time she had this ridiculous blue make-up and so I would have recognized her anywhere. Black, long, curly hair she let loose and swayed on her shoulders (by the way I wondered why hasn't she pin her hair up). The beautiful dark skin contrasted with her white exercise outfit, and her dark lips revealed a gentle smile every now and then. She got it. Did I have doubts? No. But how come I didn't consider the possibility that we would meet? I am a retard.

Gośka swept her eyes around the room and suddenly looked at me. She was confused. After a moment she looked at Marcus, who was standing next to her, whom I had not noticed so far, as well as Blanka and all the other people in the room. Marcus shrugged his shoulders, smiled at the girl and moved toward me with the face of a royal jester who is just about to ridicule his king. I walked away from the guys toward the mirror and pretended I was warming up. 

Bravo you coward, a masterful move! - I said to myself. I watched the girl in the mirror, praying that she didn't want a confrontation at that moment, because of the fact that it would happen, I was convinced. She, on the other hand, raised her head higher and strode across the room with more dignity than Wikyoria had done moments earlier, smiled at the group of girls to whom Blanka had led her to, and drowned in girl talk.

- She got in - I said through my teeth to Marcus, who had just approached me and was leaning with his back against the bar entwining his hands on his chest.

- You're screwed! - he said proudly.

I didn't know how badly, yet.