From Turkey With Love|| SKAM

All the time in the world

Thursday, July 20

03:00

Yousef: Dear Sana,

I cannot sleep and feel like shit right now. I got so happy when you answered that you do think of me as your boyfriend, but then I got this uneasy feeling the past days that you must think I am an idiot, that you can't trust, who just say things.

I wish I knew what you think of me now. I wish I could look you in the eyes, see your face.

I get it, all cards on the table. I believe in honesty, not secrets or lies. But maybe we tried too much, to be close although we are far apart? Maybe we should just talk about certain things f2f?

Don’t get me wrong, I’ll answer any question you might have. And I want to know everything about you.

You have no idea how much I wished I never kissed Noora, that you never saw that. But I really do not hook up with people or sleep around.

I did it with this girl about a year ago, I thought I was in love but that was just wishful thinking. Anyway, it got bad, didn’t end well, but I think I have learned from it. About myself, what is what, love, feelings or just “hormones” like you put it ;)

I know better now, I know what I want and what I believe in. I am for sure stronger and more mature now and soon I won't even be a teeager anymore som maybe there is hope for me?

08:15

Sana: ok I don’t judge you or your hormones ;P

She felt guilty for avoiding him for three days.

Sana: I haven't slept well either. The Cure is no cure!

We can talk more about things some other time. No rush

Sana added “All the time in the world”, the Fun Lovin Criminal version, to the playlist. She felt like she needed to see him, hear his voice.

Sana: Wanna skype soon?

Yousef: <3 I’m at work, I’ll leave summer camp around 17. We can skype then

Sana: ok! later

Sana: wait, your five or my five?

Yousef: my five, 16:00 in Olso

<3

…

At four Sana prepared her laptop on her bed, setting the webcam in a comfortable angel and her earphones available, untangled, on the side. She made some tea, peed and closed the door and the balcony door. She didn’t want anything to interrupt when he would call. Then she waited. It felt like forever. Then he called.

“Hi” she said a bit shy.

“Hi you… it is so good to see you” . He had a sad smile and looked both relieved and anxious.

“You look different. Your hair... and you have gotten so dark” she remarked

“Yeah, the turkish sun does that…” Yousef raised his eyebrows at her.

But it was not just that, she looked at him in a different way now, he was another Yousef. Older, she realised he was older than her, he had done a lot of things that she hadn’t. He had graduated from school, had a real job working with children, and worked as a volunteer in Istanbul and… had sex.

“You look older” she said. He looked at her puzzled, like he was not sure that was a good or a bad thing and he didn’t know how to respond to it.

Sana broke the silence. “Where are you now?”

“Ah, in a park nearby, found a spot with wifi from a café. They even have a basketball court here. Look.” He showed her bits of the park, an elephant fountain and a bridge.

“Some people around, but I doubt they know norwegian” .

“Nice!” Sana noted.

She felt the tension between them, it was almost suffocating her, and took a breath to break the silence again. “Yousef… I am so sorry that I unfriended you on facebook when you had told me that you were not muslim. I panicked, it wasn’t part of my plan” . Her voice broke a bit in the end and she tried hard not to start crying.

“No, no. Don’t be sorry” he told her compassionately. “You were trying to be smart, strategic, I love that about you. You’ll be the brain and I’ll be the heart. ok? We’d be unbeatable”.

She started to laugh while still weeping softly.

“I’m sorry for… not being what you planned” he smiled at her gloomily.

“Anyway, we cannot change anything in the past. We can only learn and move forward.” She nodded to agree with him. When had he become so wise.

They continued talking for a while, both being extra sweet and cautious with the other.

“I finished the book you sent me” Sana told him.

“Oh yeah, when did it arrive?” he asked. “Yesterday” she answered. He looked pleased. “Then you must have liked it” he seemed eager to hear her opinion.

Sana had loved the Alchemist. At first she was sceptical. She didn’t buy “the secret” bullshit, that “the law of attraction” and “positive thinking” really could give you wealth and happiness just like that. She believed more in hard work and patience. And she believed in Maktub, destiny, that God had a plan for everything and everybody had a purpose.

Yousef was more romantic. He did not believe in God as a force and designer of the universe. But he did believe in right and wrong and in love. He believed in soulmates, that some people were meant for eachother, meant to be together.

Sana wasn’t so sure that it could be only one soulmate, only one possible love. Just like with everything else, you have to make it work, fight for it. If you choose one person you will get one life and if you choose another you will get another life, both filled we good things and challenges. For sure great chemistry and strong attraction could keep you more motivated to make it work. But it could also distract you from other important things in life.

She liked that Santiago in the book, reached his destination because he never gave up. Yousef liked Santiago's conviction and that he followed his heart.

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New chapter y'all. Let me know what you guys think.
Much love
-Aj