The Dark

Maisey, 2009

May 13, 2009. Cross Street, Amador City, California.

I woke up with someone's arms around my waist. The moments from last night flashed across my mind and I relaxed. Safe. Whole. Peace. Saying those words over in my head until they became true. I was safe, I was whole, I found peace.

I looked up to find Azul sound asleep. I swear that girl would sleep all day if she could. I can't believe that she's three already. I know that it's not much but I don't want to miss out on the rest of her life. It's my duty to protect her and make sure she's happy now. She probably won't even remember most of this in a few years. Good. She doesn't need to. I moved my eyes to the person laying beside me. The person that loves me the most. The person that tries to keep me safe no matter how many times I remind him that he doesn't have too. I secretly love that though. I would never admit that out loud either.

Liam looked so peaceful, I didn't want to disturb him but I needed to get up. As I moved his arms tightened around me and I could tell that he was awake too.

"Come on, I need to get up."

"Why? Do you really need to get up?" I could hear the tiredness in his voice and wondered how much he had slept last night. Or any night for that matter.

"Yes. It's time for me to get Azul up before she wakes up on her own and cries more. Trust me, you don't want to constantly hear that."

"Fine." Before I could move to get up Liam pulled me down into a kiss then let me go. I grabbed her bag from the floor and realized how cold it was in the room. I didn't have a jacket with me, I lost it somewhere on the way here. I turned around to see Liam asleep on the floor with the blanket wrapped around his torso. I picked through her bag until I found the last of the fruit. I cut several pieces up and put them on a plate. Lifting her out of her seat I started to rock her until she woke up. Calming her down I set her in the high chair and she started to eat her favorite fruit.

Azul almost never gave me any problems. I think that she understands what's happening around her better than other three year old's would. She rarely ever talks to me though, it's mostly hand gestures and noises. I don't blame her, I'm not a very interesting person to talk to. Azul was barely 37 inches tall and didn't weigh much at all. I still was able to carry her for an unlimited amount of time.

After she finished I cleaned her plate off with a napkin and stored it back in the bag. We would need to leave today to find a better house that had running water. This was just an emergency stop, one that didn't work out for us anyway.

"Mia? When we go home?" I was startled when I heard her gentle voice again. I smiled as she lifted her hands up, a signal that she wanted to be held. I grabbed Azul under her arms and lifted her up as she laid her head down in the crook of my shoulder. I didn't know what to tell her.

"I don't know Azul, it may be a while." She looked up to stare at my face.

"Is Mia okay? You were bleeding." I was shocked at her quiet words. I really thought that she had been asleep. I convinced them to leave her alone.

"I'm okay Azul. Just a fight with an old friend." She raised her hand and laid it on my face.

"But friends don't hurt each other Mia." She was smarter than I was. Friends don't hurt each other.

"Well then I guess that she wasn't a friend then."

"Is Mia okay, really okay?" Aw. Her kindness never fails to amaze me.

"I'm fine Azul. Did you enjoy breakfast?" She smiled and gave me a thumbs up.

"What do you say that we go somewhere else today?" She looked up and smiled. Maybe we can go to the park today.