Seo Ah's POV
I raise my head while looking at his lips, he moves closer and suddenly stops. I stare at him wide-eyed, he immediately gets out of the tub without sparing a glance at me. I realize what had just happened. It was my fault, I couldn't control myself. I rush out of the washroom and tell Ji Eun to drive me home.
"Seo Ah, are you alright? You look confused and scared," Ji Eun asks.
"Eun-ah I'm doomed. I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have lost control. I must be crazy."
"Seo Ah stop crying and tell me what happened? Do you want me to kill someone? It's fine, I'll take you with me to jail."
I force a smile and tell her everything that had happened. She bites her lower lip as she parks the car and both of us head towards our room. I sit on the couch with a sigh, Ji Eun picks the tissue box from the kitchen and gets a handful of chocolates.
"Seo Ah let me ask you something, I want you to be honest. Do you really love him? Or is it just a small attraction because of his looks?"
"Eun-ah, remember I used to hate modeling because of the intense workouts and the crazy diet I was forced to follow, but I had no other choice so I kept telling myself to concentrate more on becoming a famous model. I thought that would be a good distraction, I wanted to have a passion in order to forget about all the depressing thoughts.... I was battling with myself every day and the only time I smiled was during shoots but that was just a fake smile. The fact that I couldn't be a good daughter, I couldn't fulfill my parents' wishes was slowly killing me. I thought I had no right to smile or cry.... But during the Baskin Robbins photoshoot, someone made me feel wanted and significant. The small conversations with Suga made me realize that I too can smile....I realized that I was not the only one facing problems, and if we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today. I have a strong feeling that Yoongi completes me and he's the one I would be ready to share my secrets and he is someone I truly need."
"Seo Ah, I bet he feels the same. Pabo! You call this love, you could have just said that you love him instead of wasting all the tissues and you ate two of my chocolates. But honestly, I'm proud of you Seo Ah. I'm sorry I couldn't help you... love you dumbass"
"Ok, we need to stop this drama, let me first talk to him and let's see if he feels the way I do."
"He does, he does. I can't wait to be the aunt of four babies."
"Yah! Let's see who becomes an aunt first. Also, why were you late yesterday night?"
"Umm... I had to discuss something important with Dong Yeon..."
" I guess that 'something' is family planning"
We start laughing and I doze off on the couch with my leg on Ji Eun's face.
I wake up and see Ji Eun with a pan, again. This time I check the clock first, it was eleven in the morning and I was sleeping like a snail on this couch. I rush to the washroom and look at myself in the mirror. Swollen eyes, frizzy hair, and smudged mascara. Great!
After taking a quick shower, I drive my car to Yoongi's studio. I take a deep breath before pushing the door. He looks at me like a cat peering at its baby kitten, I say with a nervous smile, "Umm... I hope you're free... can we talk?" my heart starts racing and I look down.
"Seo Ah...y-yeah sure," he says with a tone of perplexity. My hands start shaking so I hurriedly stand up. I shouldn't have come here, I shouldn't have expected anything. I clench my fist and reluctantly turn towards the door. I pull the metal handle and before I could take a step forward, Yoongi gives a tight back hug and pulls me closer. His chin on my collarbone made me forget everything that was happening.
He whispers into my ear, "I'm sorry Seo Ah. Can we just stay like this for a while? I know this will be our last time and that's all because of me. I'm extremely sorry for what I did yesterday." I rub my thumb over his knuckles and cautiously nod.
He continues, "Seo Ah- I thought I would utter this name for the rest of my life. I shouldn't have kissed you yesterday, now that just gave both of us the hope that we could be together but, we know that it's impossible. I'm not sure if you love me but I really love you and I guess you know that. I just wish I can stay with you and not listen to the public's opinion. I'm sorry I couldn't be the man who could protect you and make you happy. I'm sorry I can't do this Seo Ah..."
I turn around to look at him, his eyes filled with enigmatic pain. I wrap my arms behind his neck and bury my face in the crook of his neck. My tears run down his collarbone and his grip around my waist tightens, pressing his hard chest against mine. I control my tears and say, "Yoongi please, I need you and I really mean it. Meeting you was fate, becoming friends was a choice but falling in love with you is something I have no control over. I can't imagine a happy life without you, forget a happy life, I don't think I can survive without you. Yoongi please, help me. If I have to spend my life with someone then that will only be you. I choose you. And, I will choose you over and over and over. Without pause, without a doubt in a heartbeat. I will keep choosing you."
Yoongi says as he tightens his grip, "Seo Ah are you sure? Can we really do this? What are we going to tell others? I'm really scared Seo Ah but, a life without you is even scarier." He pulls me away with shimmering eyes and looks at me expectantly. I nod like a little kid wanting more candies as my hands travel down to his waist. I look into his eyes with a huge beam. He grabs my cheeks with his bony fingers tracing my jawline and leaves a soft peck on my lips, which made me fluster and the red tint on his cheeks was no less than mine.
