Half The World Away

Here and Queer

TW for violence and substance abuse

LOS ANGELES, OCTOBER 25TH, 2016: 18:46pm

Eddie hadn't been able to make it. He'd had a business trip, but luckily Stanley and Patty were in the audience tonight, with Grace. It was Richie's first time meeting her. One last show for a while, Richie was taking paternity leave, and so Steve had agreed to make it a Netflix special. If Richie was being honest, it was to let his fans understand him. Who he was, the truth, more depth then his interview a few months back. He was nervous, and that was understandable, and he sips anxiously on water in an attempt to calm his stomach.

"Ten minutes." His assistant says, causing him to gag." Are you okay, Mr Tozier?"

"I'm fine, just...nervous." Richie breathes out, taking another sip of water." You know how I can be."

"Your parents are in the audience; would you like me to get them for you?" His assistant asks and he shakes his head. He watches as she pulls something out of her pocket." This is from Mr and Mrs Uris."

"Oh, thank you." Richie says as he takes it from her. He opens it up, eyes tearing up as he looks at it. It's a small pride pin and he smiles as he pins it onto his navy blazer." I need a cigarette."

"Okay." His assistant says, letting him pass her. He goes through the fire exit, standing on the balcony he'd thrown up over all of those months ago. He places the cigarette into his mouth and lights it up, leaning against the barrier as the cool night air brushes against his skin, calming him. Richie had been smoking since he was 12. Maggie, although married to an ex stoner, hated nicotine. Went was also a smoker, but he didn't partake much anymore.

When Richie was 14, Maggie had caught him smoking in his room. He had been sat on the windowsill, smoking out of the open window to make sure the scent didn't go into his bedroom. He had been smoking cigarettes he'd shop lifted with Beverly and that had made Maggie even more mad. That's what had gotten him grounded. But it hadn't stopped him, and he was still smoking at age 40. He'd cut down the amount of cigarettes he smoked, and he was considering quitting, especially now he'd agreed to co-parent a baby. Maybe he'd only smoke before a show, to calm his nerves.

"Five minutes." Steve says, joining him on the balcony. Richie takes one last drag, stomps the cigarette out and heads back inside, Steve handing him a mint. He places it into his mouth and heads to the wings, anxious and trying not to puke." Look, there's Sandy, and there's your mom and dad, and Stan and Patty...there's a child sleeping on her."

"That's Grace, their adopted daughter." Richie says, looking at his family and friends from the wings." Daniel and Greg are both here too, and Ali."

"Daniel...Daniel Hart?" Steve asks, Richie glancing at him, eyebrow raised. Dan looked a lot like Richie, except he had brown eyes, not blue. They were about the same height, both wore glasses, both had curly brown hair and were both gay.

"Yeah, why? He is my friend." Richie responds, Steve blushing." Oh you wanna get in his pants, I get it."

"Shut the fuck up." Steve snaps with a sigh, Richie chuckling." You're due on any second. Good luck."

"Thanks." Richie says with a smile, Steve smiling back. Richie was glad that it wasn't awkward between them after he'd turned Steve down. Steve understood Richie was in love with Eddie, and Steve was one of the many people telling Richie to go for it. He wanted his client to be happy.

"Welcome to the stage, Richie Tozier!"

Anxiety washes over him again as he shakily takes to the stage. Audience applauding like crazy. He was terrified someone would heckle him or hit him at stage door. He felt like he did as a teen, scared and weak. He had to remind himself in the short walk from the wings to the microphone that he was brave for not wanting to hide anymore. Tonight was going to go well. He was sure of it.