borhap + queen imagines

gwilym lee - what was i thinking?

gwilym and i have been together for 4 years nows. i love him endlessly. he makes me happy and feel loved. i would do anything for that man. it's our 4th anniversary of being together and i wanted to do something nice for him, seeing as he always does amazing things for me. gwil had to leave early this morning for set but said he would be home right after that. little does he know, i've got something special planned for this evening..

it's 7pm in the evening and i had just finished setting up a nice romantic dinner on our shared apartment's balcony. gwil came through the door just as i had lit the last remaining candle on the table. "y/n?" i heard gwil call from the hallway. "i'm over here love." i call back, fixing up a few things to make it look better. 

"wow." i turn to face the sliding door, seeing gwil with the brightest smile on his face. i giggle and extend my hand to take his. "you did all this for me?" gwil asks, sitting down across from me. "oh no, ben was coming over but you got here before him." i tease. gwil glares at me then shakes his head, laughing. throughout the rest of the dinner, we were laughing and talking. he told me about his day at set and told me the prank joe and rami did on ben. ben apparently fell asleep on his makeup chair and joe and rami decided to blow airhorns in his ears. i giggled just thinking about how silly all four of them were. 

after dinner, gwil offered to clean up and for me to stay seated. i did as i was told and patiently waited for gwil to come back. i stood up and walked towards the banister, looking out to the gorgeous LA city lights. i took in a deep breath when i felt two arms wrap around my waist. i laid my head back onto his right shoulder as he kissed my neck softly. "i love you, y/n, thank you for doing this." gwil whispers in my ear. i've always loved it when he whispered in my ear. i turn around and hug him around his neck. "i would do anything for you, gwil." i whisper back. "close your eyes." confused, i let go of him and look up at him. "what?" i ask. "close your eyes." he repeats, in a slow tone. 

i do as he says and i close my eyes. after a few seconds, gwil speaks up. "you can open your eyes now, darling." i open my eyes and glance down to see gwil on one knee with a ringbox in his hand. i gasp and put my hands to cover my mouth, tears already finding their way to my eyes. "y/n y/l/n, from the moment i met you, i knew you were the one for me. your laugh brightens up my day, your smile brings me every kind of joy and i do not know what i would do without you. so, what i'm trying to say is.." gwil opens the ringbox and inside in a gorgeous diamond ring with a y/f/c (your favourite colour) gemstone in the middle. i can't hold it in. a happy sob escapes my lips as i wipe a few loose tears away. "will you marry me?" the question hits me like a freight train. we have always talked about getting married and having kids, but i never thought in a million years how much that question makes me happy. i nod vigorously. "yes! yes! one hundred times yes!" i repeat as gwil laughs and puts the ring on my finger. "i love you gwilym lee, so fucking much." i say, kissing him passionately on the lips. "i love you more y/n lee." i laught at the sudden name he gives me as we walk back inside. 

3 YEARS LATER

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that night gwilym lee proposed to me was the night my life changed forever. the next day we told the others and they were beyond proud of us. my mum and dad were crying as soon as i showed them the ring. everyone we told were so happy for us. i was happy and so was gwil. but i guess happiness doesn't last forever. 

3 years into our marriage, i decided i wanted to get a divorce. it broke me into pieces but it was for the best. gwil had become far too busy and i was getting rather lonesome at home by myself for months on end. we used to call and text every night but those nights slowly died down to a call a week, a text every second week and then suddenly, nothing at all. i missed him so much it hurt me to even think about him. the nights he would come home, the dinner table was silent, nothing but the sound of the cutterly dragging across the dinner plates. endless sleepless nights where we would sleep so far apart, we would almost be sleeping on the floor. we would barely talk to one another only a few head kisses and a hi. but i didn't want any of that. i wanted him back. i wanted my loving husband back.

one night, i sat gwil down on the couch. "what's wrong y/n, are you okay?" gwil asks, sitting next to me. i sighed and shook my head 'no'. gwil scooted closer. "what, what is it?" he asked, grabbing my hands and holding them. i wanted to move them away but decided not to. tears were already near the edge to falling. gwil saw this and looked more concerned than before. "i want a divorce.." i speak softly, hoping he didn't hear me. he did. gwil let go of my hands and breathed heavily. "wh-wh-what..why?" gwil stutters, his voice breaking. 

"i never see you anymore. we don't even talk when you get home. you're always silent at the table when we're eating dinner and y-you d-don't even make love to me anymore." i whimper, trying so hard to keep my voice steady. gwil shakes his head and grabs my hands again. "love, you know i've been busy with filming and interviews-" "but that doesn't mean you can't stop fucking talking to me gwilym!" i shout, pulling my hands away and standing up. gwil stands up after me, trying to pull me into him by my waist. i let him touch me because i know this is the last time he ever will. "y/n, please don't do this. i'm sorry, i'll make everything better, i promise." gwil says, almost shouting. i shake my head and pull away again. "you want to make everything better?" i ask. he nods his head. i sigh. "then let me go." a tear streams down gwil's face. i walk past him and walk up to our bedroom to collect some things.

i expected gwil to have followed me to the bedroom but he stayed in the living room, crying with his head in his hands. i start to pack some clothes, my makeup, toiletries and other things. i go through the top drawer of my dresser to see if i can find anything else and that's when i come across our wedding photo album. a sob comes out of my mouth as i sit on the bed and go through the album, tears falling on every page. i don't want to leave him. i can't leave him, i love him too much. what the fuck am i doing?

i walk to the living room and find gwil sitting on the floor, a full whisky bottle in his hands. my heart hurts just seeing him like this. i walk closer to him and he looks up at me. i give him a soft, teary eyed smile and sit down next to him. "i'm sorry." i say. gwil looks at me. "no baby, you have nothing to be sorry about. if anything, i'm the one to blame. i did this to us. i'm sorry." i stand up and signal for him to stand as well. he does and i take the bottle out of his hand and place it on the dining table. i pull him into me and he hugs me tighter than he has done in a long time. "i'm not leaving you. i can't. i love you too much. we can work this out. together." i whisper, pulling out of the hug and glancing up at my sad, heartbroken husband. gwil smiles and puts both of his hands onto my face, kissing my softly. "i will do anything in my power to make us happy again." i smile at his words. "can we get a puppy?" i ask. gwil chuckles. "we can get two." i smile at his demeanor and hug him again.

what was i thinking? 

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A/N: omg sorry this is so long and sad. i was going to make it end with a sad note but i changed my mind last minute. i hope you guys liked it xx

danielle <3