Waves of Ruin

Chapter 14

We left this morning. I went up on the main deck to oversee the departure, the supplies put away and everyone doing their jobs. Then I immediately left to the navigation room. Last nights dreams were filled with terrors from the contents of the letter. My mother cheating on my father, them lying to me for over 20 years, and the fact that I am not related to my family the way I believed.

I sit in my chair, the weight of this new information pushing down on me. Sinking me into the ground beneath the waves, unable to reach the surface again. Questions swirl around in my head. Is this the reason father hated me? The reason mother never stood up to him? Did she not want me to know? Was she disgusted by me?

Part of me wishes I was back at home to confront them about all of this, but another part wants never to talk of this. I yearn to pretend that all of this is a job, a lie to hurt me even with distance, but deep down I know it's true. And I legitimately know that, no matter how much I want to, I will never be able to forget this.

There is a knock on the navigation's old wood door. It opens before I can gesture the body in. Cianna comes in and sits down, she seems to be upset by something and I hope that her sister went and talked to her so I don't have to lie. We are very close, having started on this ship about the same time. I look up to her, she knows exactly what she wants and what she is worth.

She huffs. "Can you believe Vinnie." She says.

Ah. Thank the skys she took my advice. "It's normal to want to leave on your own for a time, I'm sure she will return after a bit." I say.

It's too late when I start to notice Cianna's eyes go wide. "What!" She yells. "I was talking about her complaining about the food."

"Oh mother father." I say pressing my hands to my face. I am too completely distracted for this conversation. I just outed her sister when I promised I would't.

She looks at me and her eyes start to shine. Her dark blue eyes start to shed water. Becoming as dark as the ocean a dusk. I didn't think it possible but they are more impressive this way. Then she whispers, "She is leaving?"

I sigh. "Yes..."

That's when she finally breaks down, the sobs come in crashing currents. Like a flood gate has finally been released. I have never seen her cry. She is tough and the best shooter I have ever met, so this is new. "It's going to be okay, she just wants to try something knew, I'm sure if you talk to her about why you have been so strict she might change her mind."

"I can't." She says between sobs. "I haven't told anyone why I am here, my sister has no idea either."

I know that everyones past is not the main conversational piece here, but I didn't expect this. "Talk to me, I promise I won't tell anyone." I wouldn't be surprised if she said no, for multiple reasons. Firstly, I just exposed her sisters secret and secondly, I haven't shared much about my past either, or present for that matter.

She slows her sobs, tears still running down her soft lightly tanned cheeks. "My sister and I have had a difficult relationship since she was born. by the time she was old enough to remember me I was gone. My parents filled her head with lies about me and why I left." She breaths, not able to make eye contact with me. "My mother and father decided that because of my looks it would be most beneficial to them if I was married off for money, so by the time I was 16 I knew what was going to be my life."

I stay quite, not knowing what to say, or how to say it. So I let her keep going.

"He wasn't a good man, but he had money and was willing to pay. My parents weren't in desperate need or I might have gone through with it, they were just greedy, trying to convince me that my sister who was only a few years old needed it. On the day it was to happen I told my family I wasn't going through with it, and the only way to do this was to make sure he wouldn't marry me. They got so angry when they found out that they kicked me out." Her sobs start again.