Eternal Love

Pain and War

The Bhil village was badly damaged. Homes were destroyed, people robbed, all in one night. Kelwara was scared. Pratap's fist tightened in anger. Must be the Afghans seeking revenge. He ordered his men to search the forest. He ordered the servants to help the villagers. Sword in hand he walked into the dense forest. Something moved behind him. He could feel it, it was no animal. He turned around. He had moved a little away from the others but he could hear Raoji's voice still somewhere. With another twist of twigs, he looked up to see two birds fly away. Nothing could be heard, there was dead silence. He could sense someone watching him.

The assassin was trained for these situations. He was taught to be invisible, to serve his master. He had done this before. But this time he had to be careful. This was Pratap Singh. The same prince who scared the Emperor enough to send him instead of going for a direct war. He smiled. He was capable of doing what Akbar couldn't. Kill off, Pratap. He could see the prince look here and there. He waited for the right spot. Yes, Pratap was approaching the spot. Beneath the tree in which he sat. Pratap stood beneath the tree looking around. Suddenly, the assassin jumped on him. He was too late to move away but he moved a little, enough for the man to miss the right spot. His poison-rubbed dagger hit Pratap's right arm instead of his chest. He held the man with his left one. The man took out another dagger to hit him but he was late, Pratap swung his sword, with his left hand and the man lay dying.
" Who send you?"
The man smiled a wicked smile even in death.
" Tell me." Pratap's vision was blurring. He sat down.
" Akbar, you won't survive this poison, Kunwar Pratap Singh!" Pratap was having a blackout. He saw the man dead before he fell unconscious.

Back in the palace, Ajabde's meditation broke.
"Kunwarsa!" She stepped out of the Puja Ghar.
" Kasturi! Kasturi!"
" Ji Baisa?"
" Go to Kelwara, now!"
" Ji?"
" Go, now! Something is wrong, come back with news!"
" What happened?" Jaivanta Bai and Hansa Bai rushed to Ajabde's side.

" I don't know, I feel... I feel something is terribly wrong there. Go, Kasturi!" No one had ever seen the soft-spoken Ajabde shout like this. Jaivanta said a soft prayer in silence as Ajabde took her Arthi thaali.

Raoji was looking for Kunwarsa everywhere. He was calling out in vain. Some Afghans were caught but where was Kunwar Pratap? Pratap was having hallucinations. He saw himself on a beautiful white horse, never had he seen such a majestic horse in his life. He was going to Chittor, he missed home. He tried to open his eyes.
" Raoji..." He thought he was shouting, but his voice was too low.
Eyes closed again, he saw Ranima welcoming him to Chittor. He was walking to his room. There was someone there already. In his room? She turned around with a smile. " Ajab?" He heard himself say.

Raoji found a motionless Pratap with a dead man, a knife stabbed his arm, bleeding. He feared the worst. Thank god he was breathing. Immediately a horse-drawn cart was arranged to take him back to Bijolia. Everyone from the bhils to the guards to Raoji himself was praying that he kept breathing.

Pratap opened his eyes with great difficulty. He saw the sky above him moving. He heard someone say " Kunwarsa!" He saw her again. In his room. She was wearing a mang tika. She was smiling at him.
" Ajabde what are you doing here?"
" Where will I be than here with you?" she giggled. Then everything went dark.

" Baisa! Baisa!" Kasturi was out of breath as Jaivanta Bai, Hansa Bai and Ajabde rushed out.
" Kunwarsa .... Kunwarsa is badly injured... he is ... he is almost breathless." Jaivanta Bai sat down numb on the floor as Hansa held her. " Jaivanta!"
" Nahi..." Ajabde nodded her head.
" No, No. Kasturi calls the Vaid now, call Chakrapani too. Get some nurses ready."
She rushed to Kunwarsa's room. She made sure the bed was comfortable and the room was clean. Raoji was surprised to find a nursing room ready as soon as they arrived.
" Quick, get to make the medicines, all of you!" Ajabde ordered.
" Manthi, help me clean his wound."
The servant removed his cloth, blood-soaked red as Ajabde pressed the antiseptic balm and water on the wound. He moved a little.
" He is responding Vaidji." Chakrapani was happy. Jaivanta rushed in and sat on the bed.
" Pratap!" There was no response.
" Why is he not responding now?" Vaidji was worried. His breathing was minimal.
" Get me some tulsi, neem, and Haldi, as well as some laung." Vaidji started making medicine.
Ajabde looked at his face while cleaning the blood. So much blood and her clothes were red. Her hands... He looked like he was sleeping. Her eyes filled up.

Raoji noticed his daughter's pain.
" Ajabde, leave!" He ordered.
" But Daata!"
" Vaidji is here, leave!" I don't want people to blame you for any mistake Ajab, understand.
Hurt, she looked at Jaivanta who sat holding Pratap's hand. She looked like a stone-cold statue. Slowly Ajabde walked out and towards the Puja Ghar. Her hands and lehenga were still blood clad. She sat down in front of the Lord, her face hidden in her hands. She cried like she didn't care if someone saw her or not. I should have met him, he wanted to talk, and I should have talked!
The blood from her hand was now on her forehead and hairline. She didn't have a clue. She sat praying. Ratan came in.
" Jija?" She looked up, eyes cold.
" What have you done to yourself, your face, hands, hair... your lehenga!" She exclaimed.
" He has lost so much blood!" She said crying.
" Jija, come with me, get cleaned, if you fall ill, it will be an additional worry to Daata."
" No Ratan. Am not leaving until he makes things better." She looked at the Lord. Ratan walked out worried. She came back with a bowl of water and clothes and cleaned Ajabde. She was all grown up in a matter of hours. Kuwarsa had such an effect on her too.

The day passed to evening. Hansa asked scared, " He is okay?"
" No he is still in danger, nothing can be said until he responds to someone or something," Vaidji replied.
" Call Ajabde!" Jaivanta spoke her first words in hours. Raoji was shocked. "Ji?"
" Call Ajabde right now!" Hansa walked out.
" Ajabde ?" She called softly.
She was startled and rushed out asking, " What happened ma? He is fine na? Is he not breathing?" She had cried so much that there were no tears left.
" Calm down, Jaivanta has called you."
She stepped over the threshold of his room.
" Ji?"
" Bulaiye..."
" Ji?"
" Call him, call him to wake him up. He will listen to you."
Jaivanta looked up at her like she was the only hope. Raoji walked out on the scene, whatever was happening spelt trouble for him.
" Kunwarsa... Kunwarsa!" She called softly, no response.
" I don't think I can do anything else," Vaidji concluded.
" Nahi!" Ajabde stopped him.
" Kunwarsa wakes up, prove them wrong. Kunwarsa sees you are Mewar's hope, Akbar will come to take Mewar, you have to save us, you have to save your motherland Kunwarsa. You have to save me. " She sobbed. " Kunwarsa wake up!" She shouted. He lay there as if nothing got to him. She could take the pain no longer. She was about to rush out.
" A...aa...Ajab!" He murmured something. Vaidji checked his pulse. " It's increasing."
" Baisa, talk to him!" Chakrapani pleaded. She turned around.
" Wake up Kunwarsa, you need to save Mewar, you need to fight many more battles!" She continued. Jaivanta looked at his hands tighten into a grip. He was responding! Vaidji stopped Ajabde.
" It's okay now Baisa, he responded." Ajabde stopped wiping her tears. She remembered her father's words and was about to leave.
" Ajabde!"

This time his voice was clearer, everyone heard what he said as he repeated. " Ajabde?" She stood frozen in the doorway looking at him, eyes closed it was like he was having a bad dream, his face was disturbed. Jaivanta Bai, Hansa Bai, Chakrapani and everyone else in the room were looking at her. She sat down on the threshold as Hansa Bai came to her. Jaivanta got up.
" Save my son Ajabde." It was more like a plea.
" Save him, be with him. Please!"
" Ranima!" She hugged the sobbing mother. " Don't say please."

She was there the next two days, day and night, looking after him, applying for his medicines and feeding him. After two days he opened his eyes. The first thing he saw was her. The last thing he remembered was that dream of hers. She sat eyes closed on the seat beside the bed. He could tell she was not sleeping for days. He tried to get up.
" Ahh!" His voice startled her.
" Kunwarsa!" Eyes met. She was about to hold him but she didn't. Instead, the Vaid came to his aid.
" I am going to tell Ranima he is awake." She rushed off.

Within minutes everyone he knew was flocking around him. But his eyes searched her, She was not there. He looked at Hansa Mausi.
" Ajabde has gone to the temple. She had a Mannat." Hansa Mausi smiled. Something told him these were just excuses she was showing.
She came back with Prasad much to his delight.
" Ajabde... " He smiled at her, she looked away.
" Prasad. " He took it with his unharmed arm.
" Dhanyavaad Ajabde, I heard what you did for me and I..."
" It was my Dharm Kunwarsa, we Samanth are meant to shield and save our masters." Her words shocked him and hurt him more than the wounds.
" What is wrong with you Ajabde?" He looked at her calm face. She turned around to walk off but he held her wrist. " Answer me."
" Nothing is wrong Kunwarsa, you get well." She freed herself from his weak grip and rushed out. She was sobbing he could tell. Chakrapani came in to witness a preoccupied Pratap!
" Baojiraaj, get well quick, my wedding has been fixed the next week."
He smiled at his friend. Amidst the clouds, this good news was like sunshine.

In the evening a daasi came in with food and medicine.
" Kunwarsa, Baisa send you food."
" Where is she?"
Daasi was quiet.
" Am not hungry, go. Tell your Baisa."
" Kunwarsa, you need food. " Hansa Bai came in. " And for having medicines you need to eat right too."
" Mausi..." He was reluctant to ask.
" I am sending Ajab. She will make you listen." She walked out with a smile he didn't see.

" Why are you doing this?" She was like a teacher, barging in with complaints.
" You are here." He smiled.
" Why are you not eating? What are you trying to prove here? You don't want to get better is it?"
" Why were you not coming?"
" Eat your food Kunwarsa!" She ordered.
" Have you eaten?"
" yes!" She lied.
" Come. Let's eat."
" I have work. I need to go."
" Fine, go!" He was visibly angry and clueless at her behaviour.

Five days passed by, and he got better. Now he was ready to step out of his room. He needed to find her, she had carefully avoided the corridors to his room since that argument. He smiled. The only way to get her to come to him, he knew.
Ratan rushed into Ajabde's room.
" Kunwarsa!"
" What happened to him?"
" He is ... at the arena with his sword."
" What? His hand is still injured!" Ajabde rushed out leaving Ratan in all smiles. Her job was done.

" What do you think you are doing?" His sword stopped mid-air at her voice. He smiled.
" Practicing?"
" Kunwarsa, you know you are not all right, your hand is still injured. Do you have any idea how much people did for you while you laid there?"
He listened to her banter. Hansa Bai and Jaivanta Bai stepped onto the roof to watch the duo.
" She can handle him well!" Jaivanta smiled.
" And what everyone went through? The thoughts the fears, the anxiety all because of you! "
Pratap laughed.
" You seemed brave to me, you are scared about injuries like this?"
" It is not funny! Ranima was so worried for you."
" Was Ranima the only one worried?" His question made her look up at him.
" Everyone was worried, you are Mewar's future."
" Why were you worried Ajabde?"
" Because I care. We all care. You are like family. Ranima is family."
" Then what is making you avoid me?"
" Because I ...." She stopped.
" You?" Pratap was looking for an answer.
" I need to go, it's your life Kunwarsa, Do whatever you please." She walked away as he kept calling.

He sat in his room confused. He felt she felt the same way, why was she behaving like this?
Ranima came in.
" Pratap?"
" Ji?"
" Go talk to Ajabde."
" Ji?" He looked up at his mother.
" You know what you feel, don't keep it inside, it will kill you."
" But Ranima, she is behaving so awkwardly... Like she doesn't want me around."
" She is scared of Pratap, of the people, of the social norms and of herself. Tell me truly Pratap, aren't you scared too? But you are a brave warrior, you fight for what is yours, she is more comfortable in letting go of difficult things."
" What is right and what is wrong Ranima?"
" What your heart says is never wrong."
He was there at dinner with Raoji. He passed on a piece of paper for Ajabde to Ratan. Ratan rushed to the kitchen with it.
" Meet me tonight, on the Roof, it's important!"
Ajabde was worried. She feared the obvious. But she needed to go. Otherwise, he would think...

Pratap waited in anxiousness. He tried out different ways of telling her in his mind, cancelling them out one by one. The sound of her Payal made him turn.
" What is it? Tell me quickly, tomorrow is Saubhagwati's Haldi. I need to go."
" Yes, yes, Haldi... Do you like marriages?" What are you saying, Pratap?
" Huh? Yes, it's my friend's wedding."
" Yes Yes mine too, am very excited. " He looked away awkwardly.
" Would you like to get married someday?" He looked at her again.
" What?" She was shocked.
" I mean.. to someone... someday." Stop talking Pratap! His mind screamed at him.
At this, Ajabde was laughing. He missed this carefree laughter.
" Kunwarsa are your medicines too strong? What are you saying?"
" Woh... I..."
" Subhratri!"
" No, wait... Ajabde." She walked away with a smile. He slapped his hand against his head, " Hai Eklingji"

The next day both houses were busy with a wedding. Raoji was making preparations for Udai Singh's arrival. Pratap looked around the palace, there was no sign of Ratan or Ajabde. Jaivanta caught him.
" Did you tell her?"
" No... I couldn't"
" Has the warrior in you made you a lesser emotional person Pratap?" Jaivanta smiled. Hansa came in to interrupt the conversation.
" Ajabde and Ratan are at the bride's home, we need someone to take the Haldi there, who should we send Jaivanta?"
" I will go." Pratap smiled readily.
" But you have to hurry, the mahurat ends in a few minutes."
" Yes yes." He took the Haldi and rushed out.

Ajabde was blocking the doorway, ordering how to decorate it with flowers. Before she could move before he could stop he bumped into her at full speed. She was about to fall but he caught her by the hand and amidst that half, the Haldi were on them. They looked at each other shocked, just like everyone else around them.
" Shama Kijiye," They said in unison.
" Aree, the Shagun Haldi is on both of you!" Laughed Bhagwati's mother. " Baisa I will tell Hansa Ji to look for a groom for you soon!" She took the Katori from the surprised Pratap's hand. They looked at each other smeared in the Haldi as he swiftly said " I should leave." With a soft shy smile.

She was cleaning off her Haldi, in vain when Ratan came in.
" Come quick Jija, Ranaji is here."
Ajabde and Ratan walked behind Hansa to the doorway. They saw Jaivanta bai greet him with aarti. Her formal tone with the king surprised Ajabde as she looked at Pratap's face, not at all pleased to see his father.
He touched his feet and Udai Singh formally said, " Kunwar Pratap I heard about your health. How are you now?" No love, no worry in his tone.
" Am fine now." Same with Pratap. Ajabde stared confused at the family.
" These are my daughters, Ajabde, and Ratan, and I have a son too, Balwant, he is a month old. " Raoji introduced them.
Ajabde touched his feet so did Ratan.
" Gani Khamma Hukum, Welcome to Bijolia." Ajabde's greeting made him smile as Pratap looked at Jaivanta Bai and back at the scene.
" Ajabde... you have a very different name." Udai Singh smiled. Pratap looked at his father. He liked Ajabde too. Pratap smiled a proud smile, as though she is his pride.

The Baarat was at the door and Hansa, Jaivanta and the girls were already with Bhagwati's family, choosing their sides. Ajabde was helping a nervous Bhagwati get ready as Ratan was staring at her jewellery.
" You got very nice wedding jewellery." She complimented.
" Your jija, will get better Ratan. After all, she will be Mewar's Kuwarani." A ring fell from Ajabde's hand as they laughed.
" Chup Bhago, don't say such things." She blushed red.
" What is it Ajabde? As much as you two hide it, everyone knows. "
" Yes she is right, you should tell him Jija."
" Ratan!"
" She is right, he won't be in Bijolia forever."
" All I know is I am a Samanth Putri and he is the future king." Ajabde's voice hinted at sadness.
" Love doesn't see status Ajab"
" People do!"

Their conversation was interrupted by the sounds of the Baarat. The wedding was simple and beautiful. They exchanged garlands as their friends smiled and teased. Ajabde smiled at the couple and then at Pratap who smiled back. They were taking their vows and they showered petals on the couple. He searched the crowd for her and she smiled back. Udai Singh had never seen his eldest son so happy. He was smiling. But at whom? He followed Pratap's gaze and his face grew serious. He called Jaivanta Bai to talk alone.
" We are leaving tomorrow, including Pratap."
" But you said he will stay here for some months and..."
" I changed my mind, tell him we are leaving."
" But why Ranaji?"
" Because he likes that Samanth girl."
" That girl has a name. Ajabde!"
" You know about this? How can you allow this?"
" I see nothing wrong."
" Nothing wrong? Our family's reputation will be at stake. "
" It was a stake the moment you handed Shams Khan the keys to Chittor, instead of fighting."
Udai Singh fumed in anger at her words.
" Tell Pratap or else I will. And on reaching Chittor, I am telling Dheerbai to look for a bride for him."
" I am his mother, I will choose his bride!"
" And your choice is this?"
" Yes it is, you don't know her, so stop insulting her, how she saved Pratap..."
" It's no time to be emotional Jaivanta Bai. It was her duty."
" Everyone doesn't follow their duties Ranaji, as fathers, husbands, sons..."
" You are telling me? I gave you and Pratap everything!"
" By snatching his love ?"
" He is a child, he will forget her eventually."
" You don't even know your son Ranaji. He will die than marry who you choose." Jaivanta smiled sarcastically. " He won't give in. Not to you and Dheer. He is my son. I taught him to fight till the end."
" We will see about that!" Udai Singh stormed out.

After the wedding, the people gathered, for some fun and games. Bhagwati's uncle was a well-known astrologer and everyone flocked around him. Jaivanta walked in witnessing Pratap stare at Ajabde as she giggles with her friends.
" Panditji, can you see my son's hand?"
" What? No Ranima I..." He was reluctant but gave in.
" You have unique Nakshatra... I see the struggle, for everything dear to you... you will win eventually, every time, except once. You will be a great king."
" What about family?" Jaivanta enquired shocking both Pratap and Ajabde.
" He will find love, he will be loved... by all... peace will reign in his family... I see alliances... But love too... your son will be a great king too."
Hansa turned to Ajabde, " Show him your hand." Everyone was giving awkward smiles to each other.
" Ji?"
Jaivanta repeated, " Show him!"
" I see... struggle... in your heart and mind... you struggle with your ideals... you love your motherland... you have a very good fortune, enough to change someone else's fortune ... you will have a happy marriage... a brave son... but... but I see struggle, sacrifices, you will win eventually."
Ratan interrupted, " See mine."
" Be with the person you love the most to get what you desire. You will marry a prince, but winning love will be very difficult." Ratan only heard Marry A Prince! Her day was made.

But Ajabde was worried. Struggle. Win. Brave Son. Love. The words were too common in both their predictions. She closed her eyes in fear. A daasi came to inform " Kunwarsa, Maharanisa and Ranaji are leaving tomorrow."
" Leaving?" her heart skipped a beat. " He's leaving?"
She went to the Kanha temple in her restlessness.
" Tell him before he goes." Ratan, and Bhago all told her the same thing. It felt so wrong.
Footsteps startled her, she knew it was him. She wiped away the tears.
" I was looking for you all over." Eyes met, he knew she had cried.
" I am leaving tomorrow."
" I know Kuwarsa."
" Anything you want to tell me Ajabde?"
" No..."
" But I want to..." She looked up at him.
" Don't..." Tears filled her eyes. " Just Don't !"
" Why Ajabde? "
" You know why!"
" No, I don't. Am doing what Ranima told me to do, follow my heart."
" What about Ranaji? What about Mewar?"
" What about Us?" His words made her sit down.
" Kunwarsa please leave."
" Ajabde, he is right, we are Rajputs, we don't give up without fighting." Jaivanta's words made her stand up.
" Ranima..."
" If you won't be with him in his struggle for you, you will make him weaker."
" Ranima, Ranaji's order..."
" I don't care for his orders, he never cared for Ranima or me!" Pratap was visibly angry. " I don't need him. Or his throne."
" Yes you do, you need to serve Mewar and prevent Akbar."
" I can do that without Rana Udai Singh."
" No, you can not, you need armies, you need allies, you need weapons. Going against him will not help."
" Just look at her Ranima, who is she thinking about?"
" Mewar, my people, my motherland."
" Those are equally important for him too Ajabde, but if he is forced to marry someone like Dheerbai, he will never be happy, he can never serve his motherland." Jaivanta reasoned with her.
" I would rather die," Pratap replied.
" Kunwarsa! You are at a temple, stop it." Ajabde was angry.
" You are at a temple too Ajabde, stop lying to yourself, stop being scared, of yourself, your happiness and your future. I came here for you. I am here for you, all I need is a little support from your end. Everyone is with us. Hansa Mausi, Ranimaa... I taught you to fight, to defend and attack, I never said leave the war and run away Ajabde!" He was in tears. She looked up at him. Jaivanta was about to leave. Her work was done. Pratap was ready to follow, but disappointed.

" Kunwarsa." Her voice stopped him as Jaivanta walked away.
" I am ready, you taught me to fight, you lead this war, I will follow." Pratap stared back at her stunned before breaking into a smile. " I knew you won't leave me to this alone."
" I can never."
" I will see you at dinner." She nodded as they walked away.

At dinner, Udai Singh told Raoji, " Am thinking of getting Kunwar Pratap married soon. There are so many eligible princesses around Rajputana."
"Of course Hukum, anyone would be lucky to get him as a husband."
Pratap looked at his smiling father with cold eyes and then at his mother. Ajabde walked in with food and seeing his face she knew something had happened.
" Your daughter is of marriageable age too, when are you looking for a groom for her?" Udai Singh's words made Pratap tighten his fist.
Ajabde stepped forward, " Hukum, Our people believe if we talk during dinner, it insults our Annapurna, please keep our honour and eat at Bijolia." She said with a smile.
Raoji was surprised, " Ajabde you know who you are talking to?"
" Yes Daata, he is the Rana of Mewar, the server of Eklingji, Maata Annapurna's husband."
" She is right Raoji, let's eat." She smiled as she served him food. Jaivanta and Hansa shared a glance and smiled. As she went over to Pratap he looked up at her and she nodded with a smile.

That night, Ajabde sat in her room, arranging her granth as he walked in.
" Kunwarsa?"
" Why? You expected some eligible bachelor who would want to marry you?" He was still angry at his father's words.
" What is it?"
" I want to give you something."
" What?"
He handed her an idol of Krishna Radha. It was so beautiful she smiled.
" You know Krishna ji didn't care for the world and its norms when he was with Radha, no strength in the world could separate them."
" Krishna ji also had a lot of Gopis."
" But there was only one Radha."
They looked at each other.
" I will come back soon."
" I know you will." He went away staring back at her at the door once.

The next dawn, Jaivanta and Hansa were hugging in tears as Ajabde touched Ranaji's feet.
" Saubhagwati bhaba." He got up on his horse. Ajabde hugged Ranima and Jaivanta whispered in her ears, " We will be back soon." She smiled back. Pratap took her parents' blessings carefully avoiding glances at her, he was scared of losing his composure.
" Gani Khamma Kunwarsa. " Ratan greeted him.
" Khamma Gani Ratan." Their eyes met.
" Chalte hai..."
" Jai Eklingji!" She smiled at him.

They rode out of the palace as she watched him go. He turned back for one last glance. He was heading to Chittor, to fight a different war this time, for her, his happiness, mostly himself. He knew she was that part of his life he couldn't do without, that part he could not afford to lose. It was his battle of love.