He Told Me...

I'm Smart

I finally feel okay again. It must have been a passing bug. I get up and go directly to the library. As soon as I get there I pull out a book on the multiverse. The theories intrigue me. I open the book to page 250, where I left off last time.

I read for what feels like years. Years and years of comfort and joy in the words written on the pages of a single book. Imagine how many years and lifetimes of joy could be spent reading this entire library. I'd never really had time for reading before, but now, I found a subject that interested me.

"You understand all this?" A voice asks, snapping me out of my thoughts.

I looked up into familiar violet eyes.

"Umm... Y-yeah. I-I guess. It's interesting to me I guess. You know... something I want to learn about." I stammer out, quickly looking away. The feeling had come back suddenly.

I can't be sick again. I can't be. What's wrong?

"Wow. You're really smart. I can barely understand most of this." Jax confesses.

"I-I guess so. I mean, it's not that big of a deal. This isn't that hard to understand after reading it for a while. It sort of just clicks in my head, you know?" I say.

"Yeah. I guess I've had that feeling before. You are really smart though." He says.

I feel myself blush. I look down at the pages of my book again.

"I- um... yeah, sure. I guess. I mean, maybe. Not really. Uhhh- I..." I stammer out.

Jax laughs. It's not a mean laugh, it's an amused laugh, like how someone would laugh if a puppy was doing something cute. I'm not a puppy though. I'm not cute. And I am absolutely, positively, 100% not in love.

"What do you want?" I ask, letting out a long sigh.

"Nothing. I just saw you and thought I would come say hi." Jax said.

My eyes narrow at him, suspicious. Was he serious?

Then he kisses my cheek and walks away. My eyes widen and I feel my stomach flip. My heart speeds up and my face gets even more red.

I was not in love. There was no way ever. I don't fall in love. My heart belongs to me and no one else. I am so totally, absolutely not in love.

Right?