Letters and Love

Chapter Fifteen: Elizabeth

Some said the older you get, the easier it is to endure hardship. I had to disagree. It was harder to keep going after Mother's death than it had been when Father died.

I'd always known I would outlive my mother. That was the way of things, but I never would have imagined that it would happen this soon or like this. It just wasn't fair, and the condolences of 'she lived a good life' were spectacularly grating.

All of my siblings, except for my youngest brother, returned to Peru for my mother's funeral. My delight at seeing my brothers and sister was marred by the reason they had come. The last time so many of us were together was when Papa died.

Why was it that tragedy brought us together? Why couldn't it be something happy?

Naturally, the house was fuller than it had ever been before. Neighbors stopped to pay their respects. Mother had been a much loved member of the community, and it was bittersweet to see so many come to give their condolences. Where had they been when she'd needed help?

I knew my attitude was not the best. Sickness was a scary thing, and who would willingly put themselves in the way of catching something? Especially something as deadly as consumption? Mother wouldn't fault them for staying away.

Angelica had taken to her bed after Mother died. It seemed she took death hard, though I couldn't say why. Wasn't death upsetting to everyone? I knew it was expected for me to be compassionate toward her, but all I felt was frustration. It fell to me to keep the house running and see to her children. Why? She wasn't the one who cared for Mother, to stay awake at all hours to see to Mother's needs, but I wasn't allowed to fall apart.

A funeral was no time to share good news. I told my sister that I would write to her about what I would do next. Maryanne was gracious enough to accept with no further questions. She was caught up in plans for her first child as it was.

However, I shouldn't have expected to escape a confrontation with one of my brothers. After my siblings left for their own homes, John told me to meet him in the parlor. I left Susan to see to anything Angelica might need and presented myself at the stated time.

"We need to talk," my brother informed me when I stepped into the room. He was walking back and forth in front of the windows. "Sit down where I can see you, Elizabeth."

I had vague memories of my father saying something similar when I was a girl. So. My brother intended for me to be set down and scolded like a wayward child. That would not happen! "You should sit down, John," I said, settling into a chair. "You look like a caged lion pacing like that."

He paused to glare at me before he resumed pacing. I folded my hands in my lap and waited. He'd ordered me here. He could begin the conversation. "Is there something you ought to tell me?" he finally demanded.

"I don't know that I ought to tell you anything, but there is something I would like to tell you." His expression darkened at my pointed answer. I took a deep breath and forged ahead. "As I'm sure you've heard from your wife, I am engaged to be married. Once I have made all the necessary arrangements, I will be joining my betrothed in the Wyoming territory."

John threw his hands up. "I didn't want to believe it," he exclaimed. "I told Angelica she must have misheard you. My sister would never do anything so stupid as to engage herself to someone without telling her family. How can you be engaged? Who is this man? Why is this the first I am hearing about it?"

"Because this is a private matter, and I wanted it to stay that way. Mr. Noah Coleman and I have been corresponding most of the summer. In his last letter, he asked me to join him as soon as I could." There. That was a succinct explanation, wasn't it? "I will begin making my plans soon."