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{Read in Dark mode!}
{warning this book involves sex, drugs, violence, and such Please don't continue further if you Get triggered easily}
You've been WARNED
"DEAR BILLY, I know there's no way in hell your listening to this but honestly i wouldve thought this is all insane, with all the monsters, alternate dimensions. so me thinking i've got shit figured out is well out the questions, a lot has happened since you left. it's been a complete disaster, dad became a mess, a complete mess. drinking all the time, yelling, shouting. he never hit us though, guess he felt the guilt from doing it to mom and you, he never did it again. him and Max's mom started fighting, really bad fights that lasted hours. i was scared it might get out of hand, i'd take max and go over to eddie's. he hates being around me most the time, says i remind him of you too much. left me and everyone else, he sent a letter once, never gave me a number or an address so i could never write back. he didn't leave us much, left me all your stuff and whatever he had left of moms, didn't leave any money. Max's mom got two jobs, we moved to the trailer park off kerley, remember we went there once cause we were both really drunk" she let out a small chuckle through her tears letting them fall down onto the letter, remembering that night "i hate how everything's been lately, i want you back, i want dad back. i want everything to back to normal even though we hated each other. the worst part is i can't tell anyone why your not here. why you're gone, i can't tell them how you saved El, or how you saved Max, how you saved me. i keep replaying that moment, i sometimes think how different things would've been if i pulled you away, if i did you would've been here, we could've been fine, happy. we could've been friends again, like we used to before mom was gone, it's stupid i know, you hated me, i hated you for hating me without a reason, but i thought maybe we could try again. that's not happening clearly, i stood there, i watched, and i pretended to be okay, to be normal but the day you died, was the day part of me died, im so sorry for not saving you when i had the chance to, i honestly hope you heard all this and i'm not an idiot talking to myself. love your annoying sister, y/n"
