Leroy Adkins is an underperformer. He barely graduated. He barely got a job, and he hardly socializes in his day-to-day life.
Zachary Turner has been sick for as long as he can remember, and as he grows older the crushing realization that he never...
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Zachary felt a lot of things during the rest of Leroy's stay. For one thing, he couldn't quite focus on what the man was saying anymore as shame and self-deprecation took over his thoughts.
Why did you think he was flirting with you? He wondered, mentally beating himself over the head. He had taken small cues and had run a mile with them, and now he couldn't undo any of it. He saw Leroy that way and he had to live with the painful fact that they would never reciprocate it.
Also, he felt like a pervert.
Well, sort of. His mind hadn't wandered that far, but it had wandered far enough. He'd imagined leaning closer, cuddling, and he'd started thinking far into the future about kissing and second base.
Well, that was daft of him, because he now had all that ingrained in his mind, and it was never going to happen. Plus, he now had the pleasure of feeling guilty occasionally anytime he caught a glimpse at Leroy and thought he was cute.
"I've never seen your sister," Leroy said out of nowhere, making Zachary look over at him. The older man sighed, resting his head back on the couch.
"Well, she has an out-of-town boyfriend now, and she's never really been here since that," Zachary said, and Leroy just hummed. "Though it's not like it's a bad thing. When she was here it wasn't like it was any better."
"Oh." Leroy's voice was low, but Zach could still sense the shock in its tone. He didn't want to sound like he disliked his sister—he didn't—it was that sometimes he had mixed feelings about her. She was about Leroy's age and had a fulfilling remote job and a boyfriend she always talked about. Zach remembered many times he couldn't leave his bedroom because she would have people over, and they would talk and laugh, and get dressed to head out to the club while he was stuck in his bedroom staring up at the ceiling with nothing in particular to do.
It wasn't that his sister wasn't helpful when it called for it. She'd been the one to drive him to the hospital, help him keep up with his medication, and look through every welfare and social security loophole that would keep him comfortable and not destitute.
It was just that sometimes Zach felt jealous. His sister had a fulfilling young adult life, and he didn't.
"Sorry, didn't mean to rag about my sister," the older man said, looking up at the ceiling. "It's just that she's really extroverted and when she was here there were just too many people..."
Leroy laughed. "Yeah. I think I understand that a bit."
"Do you have siblings?" Zach asked, perking up. He hadn't thought about that before—well, he didn't know much about Leroy in general.
Leroy nodded. "A sister, and a mum. My dad's not with us anymore."
"I'm sorry—"
"It's okay. It's been a few years." There was a sniffle from Leroy. The younger man was frowning as if he was shocked that he was teary. "Three, to be exact. Cancer, the usual."
