Leroy Adkins is an underperformer. He barely graduated. He barely got a job, and he hardly socializes in his day-to-day life.
Zachary Turner has been sick for as long as he can remember, and as he grows older the crushing realization that he never...
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"Well, what do you think?" Leroy asked, walking into the apartment that echoed with his steps because it was mostly empty. Zachary walked behind him squinting as he turned on the light switch that was in the small hallway that led to the open-concept kitchen merged with the living room. The apartment also had two bedrooms. One, that Leroy was planning to turn into an in-home office.
"The lights here are bright," Zachary muttered, staring at the white fluorescence light blubs that flooded the room and reflected off the polished dark wood floors. "It's sort of distracting."
"I'll probably change them later, so they're a dull orange like at your place," Leroy said, turning to look at Zachary who had now wandered into the kitchen and was examining the cabinet space. There was a dishwasher, oven, and inbuilt microwave, so that was something Leroy didn't have to think too much about.
"What do you think of the place?" Leroy asked, stopping beside Zachary who was now examining the kitchen island.
"It's bigger than I expected..." Zachary admitted. He'd heard the whole process for applying for and moving to the place second-hand from Leroy. Zachary hadn't had the time or the energy to tag along for most of the process but occasionally would update.
"There isn't much furnishing in here, but it looks okay so far—I think," Leroy said, walking over to the living room with a two-sitter sofa, lamp, TV stand, and television. "When you move in, we can get more stuff, but right now I'm not that hard-pressed by how things look."
"When you move in..."
Zachary let Leroy's words bounce in his head as he walked into the living room. It could be in two months—it could be in twelve. He wasn't sure yet. He had to figure things out regarding his disability entitlements and what moving and having stable work now meant for that. Also, he would have to start some sort of savings when that was gone. His sister would need to figure out renting out his space as well since she was barely at the house anyway and would like some time to get that sorted out. Gosh, the cats too. He couldn't bring all of them. He was pretty sure Leroy's apartment had a two-pet cap. Leroy started worrying about leaving feeding instructions for his sister. He sighed, shaking the thought out of his mind as he tried to focus on the present.
He had a lot to address, but yes, he did eventually plan to move in with Leroy, regardless of how long that took to figure out. They'd both agreed that the younger man should move out by himself first because it would make it less stressful for Zachary and the older man could move into the apartment slowly and could take as much time as he needed.
"I'm not keen on decor either," Zachary said as he took a sit on the sofa. "Maybe some plants?"
"You're not allergic?" Leroy asked, raising a brow as a surprised look formed on his face. "Really?"
"I mean, not that I know off," Zachary said as Leroy took a seat beside him.
"I should get you flowers then," Leroy muttered, smiling at Zachary as he leaned in a bit into him. "Do you have any favorites?"
The older man thought about it for a bit, then shook his head. "No, not really," he admitted. "Anything's fine—maybe something blue," he added quickly, and Leroy hummed, nodding as his eyes drifted to the shoes playing on the television. They couldn't hear anything, because Leroy had set the speakers to his gaming headphones before Zachary had gotten to the apartment building.
"You know, I just realized I'll be able to host Pathfinder every once in a while, now," Leroy said. "I should get a table first though," Leroy said, laughing as he narrowed his eyes at the empty space between the sofa and the TV stand.
"It's weird. I've rarely had people over because I lived with family..." Leroy trailed, realizing that moving out that he was now the grand old age of twenty-five wasn't the norm. "I've never had a place of my own before... shit, I'm going to get my first actual car in a week too," he said, realizing how much had changed within a couple of months.
"Well, I've never thought of moving before—Not like I could have afforded to financially or medically, honestly," Zachary admitted, remembering how just before his sister had got herself an out-of-state boyfriend she'd been the one doing most things for him, and even when she started going out of state to spend time with her partner she still checked up on him and made sure he could function on his own until she was back again. "I just accepted I'd probably live with my sister, and she got married and it wasn't feasible anymore. I also looked at the possibility of long-term care if my parents left us anything when they were deceased..." Zachary continued until his eyes locked with Leroy's deep brown eyes and he felt something tug in his chest—a thankfulness and longing that he couldn't quite put into words.
"Well, then I met you..." Zachary trailed, not adding anything after because it was self-explanatory to him. It might have taken forever, but he was glad that he was going to and had already experienced most of his firsts with Leroy. First kiss, first apartment, job—first love.
All of it.
Leroy didn't make him feel embarrassed for not doing any of that before now, and he felt safe not having to over-explain himself or boxed into feeling like he was just making excuses for his inadequacy. He could never be too old around Leroy—not even a little bit.
"I'm glad I met you," Zachary muttered, resting his head on top of Leroy's. "I really am. You're wonderful."
The words made Leroy's face grow warm as he felt the gravity of them.
"I love you," he muttered, not sure how else to express the overwhelming feeling of care and gratitude washing through him.
"I love you more," Zachary sighed, closing his eyes. "You can't even imagine how much."
Leroy wrapped his hand around Zachary, pulling the man closer until he could feel the man's hair tickle his face and neck. His heart was beating loudly in his ears, and he could hear Zachary's gentle breathing. The smell of the cocktail of medicines he took and essential oils had become familiar—almost as much as the smell of cocoa butter in his hair. He hoped that one day the spanking new apartment they had that smelled like fresh plain and cleaning products would start to smell like Zachary too. He hoped to see stray strands of the man's curly hair in the bedroom and bathroom as he did when Zachary stayed over at his place. He just wanted to share his space and life with his boyfriend.
Leroy knew he wasn't the most mature, well-off, or knowledgeable, but he knew to Zachary, none of that mattered. They would figure it out together—grow together, and it didn't matter if, to the rest of the world, they were behind their peers.
