Me Crying About Random Bullshit

2. Taako's tragic backstory (as of the end of The Eleventh Hour)

Screaming. Crying. Losing my mind, actually.

Alright so- critically acclaimed and spectacular Dungeons and Dragons series The Adventure Zone is known for getting people in the feels while still being funny. It's great, I love it. I am still reeling after the Eleventh Hour. THE FORESHADOWING??? AAAAAAAAAAAAA

So Taako is given a chance to fix the worst thing that happened in his life, which was originally unknown to the listener. However, in the Eleventh Hour we FINALLY get to know.

Before we get into that, I wanted to share a part of one of Taako's moments of character development.

For the race in Petals to the Metal the boys get to pick masks of an animal they feel represents them (mostly to hide their identity from the cops but whatever) Magnus picks a grizzly bear, Merle picks an owl, but Taako picks a mongoose. He is teased for it being cute and fluffy, and maybe not the most threatening.
And this happens.

Hurley: "Seriousl-- Can I ask? Grizzly bear I get for this big, beefy man beef here but... why the mongoose?"

Taako: "Because um, the mongoose has specialized acetylcholine receptors that make it impervious to venom and so they're known for killing snakes. Very surprisingly dangerous, like you know? Rikki-Tikki- Tavi. You know? You know not everything has to be a joke."
[Clint laughs]
"Sometimes you just be honest about your feelings"
[Background laughter intensifies and continues throughout]
"and that's how I see myself, you know? I may not be the most threatening silhouette, but I like to think of myself as somebody who can stand up for- You know, it doesn't always have to be goof-goof dildo machines over here, okay? I'm travelling around with the boner squad, and I never get to just say what I'm feeling. I have emotions!"

Magnus: "Cast calm emotions, quick!"

Taako: "It's not all abraca-fuck you and what have you. I have a beating heart! I'm multidimensional! I'm a fully realized creation! FUCK!"

Just keep this in mind.

Okay so-

Taako is given a chance to fix the worst thing that ever happened to him, which was during his cooking show. While this show was running his assistant, manager, boyfriend, whatever kept on asking to be featured more on his show, "Sizzle it up with Taako." Taako, who had a pretty rough upbringing of being on the road since he was 12, finally got to bask in some limelight for ONCE, and wasn't too keen on the idea. He let Sazed (the said manager man) off easy- and tried to play it cool. However, after Sazed started asking more and more, it got a bit annoying to him. However, to Taako it didn't seem like too much of a big deal.
On one faithful day, he had a large crowd of 40 people or so for his cooking show- and he was cooking up a dish for the attendees to try. Some chicken dish- I forget what it was. It was the one time he didn't try his dish before serving it.

Everyone in that crowd died.

Sazed- that FUCKING JEALOUS ASSHOLE POISONED THE AUDIENCE.

However, in this situation, serving food and watching people die immediately after, you would think "oh fuck I messed something up" and blame yourself. So for years- for SO MANY FUCKING YEARS— TAAKO THOUGHT IT WAS HIS FAULT THAT ALL OF THOSE PEOPLE DIED.

Moving on- after this happened Sazed helped him skip town, drove him away, but when they went to sleep for the night he just LEFT TAAKO BEHIND??? Like just up and left. Zippidy doo da. Gone.

So there lies Taako- after he thinks he killed 40 people and scared off his boyfriend, he has nothing left. No show, no business, no love, he's fucked. So Sazed, in theory, just rUINED HIS ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE??? LIKE WHAT THE FUCK. I HATE SAZED SO MUCH. SO MUCH.

So this whole ordeal makes Taako scared to cook for others in the present- so the man is pretty much fucking TRAUMATIZED.

But hey- remember what I mentioned before?

The mongoose?

Why was Taako so sensitive about the mongoose?

Because a mongoose can detect and be unaffected by venom.

Venom. Venom, or poison?

HE STILL WISHES HE COULDVE STOPPED IT

IM SO UPSET

Thank you Polyhexian on deviantart for making me cry

Anyway- abracafuckyou