more again ig

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by Riveria354

by Riveria354

It hurts when all I ever did for my friend is protect them. I got suspended for them. I got punched for them. I was the one that took the blame even though it was their fault.

I get attached, once I get close with someone, I will do anything to protect them and make sure they're okay. I get over protective sometimes, but that's normal when you really like someone as a friend right?

I was there for them while they were having mental breakdowns, panic attacks, I was there for them no matter what. And getting ignored is what I get? Where's the point in friends if they don't stay, and actually be there for you too?

But then I helped them. So I guess it's just them going off and do everything they wanted without feeling depressed all the time. I did so much for them, yet they don't seem to notice.

She was there for me in the beginning, and months past and we grew apart. It's like I can't even keep a friendship for no reason. Everyone I meet online and irl leaves after 2 months sometimes.

I mean that's how I was at first. No friends, alone, depressed and bad grades isn't surprising. So why not go back to that? Sometimes I like being alone. I can actually think, although I still feel guilty, because it feels like I didn't do enough.

I would do suicide, but I still feel like I haven't done enough, so I try to do as much as I can. I also don't wanna leave any of the horses. They're the friends that understand you.

I've messaged that friend like 10 mins ago. Normally they reply 2 mins later. I just feel rejected at this point.

I think those are the only reasons I'm still going. The horses and trying to do more. Oh gotta add one more, I would miss watching Catella and Justface. I mean who wouldn't? They know how to make people smile and it's amazing really, and honestly they both are the best cosplayers I've watched, the makeup, and acting. Like just wow. lol just wow, I wish I could do that too