Letters to both my future and past selves

To past me #2

July 27, 2022

It's been around 1 year and 4 months since my last entry I'm currently 18 years old and TADAH!!

You graduated!!

It's bittersweet because you really don't know what you wanna do and are your friends are leaving to continue their lives, it's like they are all soaring higher and you stuck in the same place being held down by something. I don't know what it is yet but I hope future me does.

Im still not in a relationship but it doesn't faze me as much as it used to. If only I could tell you that relationships at our age are useless. Just grow and do whatever you love while you can and someday someone will hop into your life and hopefully never want to leave.

I have so much more I want to write but we both know we're not really good with that, pretty soon Mahogany ( you know who) is going to be on her way to college your the last one staying.
You won't have anyone to hang out with anymore and I honestly wanna cry thinking about it.

I should also add, prom was nice but really cramped up in one tiny venue, however you looked hot, at the end of this I'll be adding some photos and memories so yeah be ready

A lot has happen in the year since our last entry, on February 2, 2022, 11 day before you 18 birthday, grandma passed away. I miss her a lot and I'm slowly starting to forget her voice.

Then on June 19, 2022, you found out the Brian (Ernesto) passed away to a very rare cancer, it was sudd n and it hurt a lot because he was the reason you became so outgoing in teen group sessions, it's crazy to think that that upbeat man who was always going on trips to Guatemala and bringing back souvenirs is gone.

And then, yes theirs more, sorry, on June 30th, 2022, Technoblade posted a video titled "so long nerds" And it was his dad who popped up and read a letter which he wrote for us, I'll never forget the first sentence and how I bawled hearing it, it stated "Hello everyone, Technoblade here, if you're watching this, I am dead." That hurt a lot I'm not even gonna lie, cause even though you weren't into dsmp as much anymore you still continued to watch technoblades videos cause he brought you comfort and we needed that. I still can't believe that he's really gone, however His legacy is still living, he made death merch, classic Techno move, and fans keep his name trending every week, it's amazing how much he kept this community going.

Anyways apart from the sadness I need to give you some advice for the future. Don't let them stay, bad idea.
You finally watched stranger things (how ironic, you said you would never watch it) but uh yeah season 4 came out and you watched it with Mahogany, it was amazing and you fell in love with a character named Eddie who !?SPOILER WARNING!?! Of course just has to "die" I say "die" because I don't fully know if he's dead yet, he better fucking not be.

Anyways I'm probably gonna go back to reading Steddie fan fictions and fangirling over gay shit but I just want you to know that I love you and that will never change, I promise, unless future me has other plans lol, right future me?? Btw it's currently 3:30 am for me so yeah keep that in mind, now I'll ad photos