don't rescue me

break your heart » seer | eli clark x reader

this was supposed to be like headcanons list stuff only but i'm sick in the head . /hj
i also wrote one for 📙 and 🧲

eli should've seen it coming, really. no — he had once envisioned something like this happening; you catching feelings for him. but he didn't want to acknowledge it because he loathed it.

he hated to be the recipient of your love and kindness that he doesn't deserve. additionally, his heart is already devoted to his wife whom is actually the reason he's here at this manor.

but, he also can't bring himself to downright tell you. to break your heart when everything was already nothing but hurting for you. when he's the one you've found solace in and seek for comfort.

goosebumps crawled up his skin along with the guilt as he held you in his embrace, whispering sweet nothings for another night of your crying. it eats at him thinking one day he'd be the reason for this. and he can't really comfort you for that, right?

he'd console himself by picturing you as his wife, gertrude, instead; and that gave him a small sense of peace.

until the day a foresight of you confessing occurred to him. the bitter taste of bile rose up his throat, as his heart throbbed painfully against his chest. as much as he hated the confrontation, he figured it was too late anyway to go forth peacefully. he was going to take responsibility, and confront you first, as he should have done a long time ago.

"... hey [y/n], i can tell you are in love with someone."

in the end he still couldn't bring himself to just up and say it; break your heart outright. he interjected this statement in the middle of a lighthearted talk and laughter, figuring he could use the atmosphere as a "hint" regarding your special someone.

but your pause in realization told him everything.

"do they not know i am a seer?"

he had wondered this a thousand times before, each and every time annoyance and guilt bubbled up in him; but the shock painted on your face upon realization was enough to pop that bubble up, leaving nothing but remorse.

putting up a façade, you smiled shakily, head slowly averting away from him. "r-really? was it obvious?" you jested. eli decided not to play the same game; for he's done with that a long time now.

"mm because i was once like you before. when i met my wife." he said, turning to you with a smile on his face. it was a bright smile; but instead of lifting you up like it always used to, this one felt different. you could tell that for the first time, this one was genuine. yet it was like a slap to your face. the slap of the harsh reality.

was his niceties all fake? for the sake of... quelling you; protecting you from the cruel reality that the happiness you've found in him isn't something that was meant for you.

"i wish you the best with your love life, [y/n]."