Hello, and welcome to the pilot episode of Rewriting an Unhinged Fic and Making It Even More Unhinged Somehow—also known as I Hate Myself: The Musical.
For all you lovely, confused souls out there, fear not! I'm just as bewildered as you are. I wrote this masterpiece, checks date two years ago, and promptly threw in the towel three months after publishing it. I speed-ran my way into becoming the author I swore I'd never be—quite the predictable plot twist, eh?
Since then, I've been playing an enthusiastic game of hide-and-seek with this fic, hoping it would give up haunting me. Fast forward two years: It's more stubborn than Asian Parents as you try to convince them to see a doctor and has reminded me why it's best to stay a pessimist.
I'm particularly grateful that none of my friends have read it, or at least the ones who did have conveniently forgotten it—here's to selective memory! This fic is not just a mess; it's a spectacular disaster. It's a godamn zombie that refuses to rest until one of us meets our demise. And I still need to complete Med School, so here I am, left with no choice but to exorcise this ghost from my conscience.
To any old readers who have stuck around (thank you, you delightful angels), here are the changes I've made.
↳ The Plot: Looking back, it's clear that I wrote this for the thrill of it. I tossed in whatever I thought would be "popular." It's like those wannabe chefs on Hell's Kitchen that we love to hate, throwing random ingredients into a pot and praying that it works. Surprise, Surprise. It doesn't. Even the multi-chapter format was just for the sake of having more chapters. It's a chip bag, at this point.
↳ The Characters: Oh, those poor characters—they were caught in the most amateur story hell. Jiraiya barely had any screen time despite all the hype, and Naruto is a walking cliché, even though I had grand plans for his arc. Sasuke? Oh, brother, let's just say he would give every Wattpad Character known to the devil a run for their money. I'm shocked that I didn't throw in "orbs" for eyes—small mercies.
↳ The Theme: Heavy Sigh Rereading this mess left me utterly confused. What the heck was I even trying to do? Character study? Fluff? Bad comedy? It's an all-you-can-eat buffet gone wrong.
So, where do we go from here? Well, I won't promise perfection — because let's be real here, that cannot be achieved by me — but, I do hope that it'll be a step up from the original disaster.
For anyone nostalgic or curious enough to check out the old version for comparison, you can see it in the external link.
Now, spiel aside — glad to know that's one thing that hasn't changed between Past Me and Current Me; I fear Future Me will be cursed with this as well — and let's dive headfirst into Episode Two of this series. Cue the theme song!
[Previously on Another Fucking Rewrite:—now, even longer and crazier than before!]
YOU ARE READING
Ashes of a Distant Sun
FanfictionA blond boy in an orange jumpsuit walks into a bar-it sounds like the setup to an atrocious joke, and yet, it is the catalyst for why Uchiha Sasuke stands at his door, smirk in place and a bag of Ichiraku's Ramen in hand. "So, you gonna let me in or...