Hot and Humid (Laurmani)

Chapter 4

Even though I would have been perfectly content with Lauren and me only talking when necessary, she insisted that we try to "bond." On Sunday nights, we would watch a movie together. This Sunday, we watched Oculus, and I went to sleep afterward. I don't know how long it had been since I had fallen asleep, but I was awoken by my door opening.

Lauren whispered, "Normani."

If this bitch doesn't leave me alone. "What?"

"Can I sleep with you?"

"Hell no!" I protested.

"But, I don't like sleeping by myself after watching scary movies."

I rolled over to face her. "Gawd! How old are you? Fine! You can sleep in my bed, but wash your hands first. I don't want you getting nasty germs all over my sheets."

"Ugh." Lauren went into my bathroom, and I watched her from my bed to make sure she was actually washing her hands and not just running the water. She walked out of the bathroom after drying her hands, "Are you happy?"

"Yes, and don't even think about trying anything while I'm sleeping." Lauren crawled into my bed, and I fell back asleep.

I had my alarm set earlier than usual because I was beginning clinical rotations and needed to make it down to the dental office before it opened. When I awoke, I was on my back, and Lauren was sleeping with her head on my chest and arm across my stomach. How did we get like this?

I shook Lauren to try to get her to wake up. "Lauren. Lauren. Move. I need to get up." She didn't budge, so I pushed her off of me. Wow. She still didn't wake up. She must be a deep sleeper.

After spending the day at the dental office, I came home tired. As soon as I entered the door, I slipped off my shoes and headed to my bedroom to relax for a little while. I could hear Lauren doing something in the kitchen, but didn't care to greet her. When I opened my bedroom door, I immediately noticed a few dozen roses in various places and rose pedals all over my bed.

"Shit," I said to myself. "She's going to help me clean this up." I headed to the kitchen to cuss Lauren out, but she greeted me in the dining room.

"Hey, Mani. I whipped up some Cuban dishes to give you a taste of my culture. Sit down."

She pointed her hand to the dining room table. I didn't know what was going on, but I was hungry, and the food smelled good. She followed me to the table and pulled a chair out for me. This chick is really trying to court me, but I'm too tired to shut her down. I take my seat, and she grabs a bib and tucks it into my shirt. What a weirdo. After that, she placed a candle on the table and lit it. I rolled my eyes. Here we go.

Lauren then proceeded to walk over to her Beats by Dre Pill and hooked up her iPod. Suddenly, I heard R. Kelly playing.

My mind's telling me no,

But my body, my body's telling me yes.

Baby, I don't wanna hurt nobody,

But there's something I must confess to you.

I don't see nothing wrong,

 With a little bump 'n grind.

"Lauren, why are you playing this?"

She explained, "I don't support R. Kelly because he's a pedophile, but I was able to download this illegally."

That didn't answer my question, but I didn't press her on it. She plated our food and sat at the table with me to eat. The whole time, baby-making music was playing. The food was really good, but I didn't tell her that. She takes any compliment I give her as a sign that I'm falling in love with her.

"You look tired," Lauren observed.

"I am," I replied. "It was interesting an interesting day, and I learned a lot, but I had to be on my feet all day. They're killing me."

At that, Lauren got up from her seat, walked over to me, and kneeled down. Then, she slipped off the sock on my left foot.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm giving you a foot massage," she answered.

"Lauren. How many times do I have to tell you that there will never be anything romantic between us?"

"I'm just helping a friend out. Why do you have to make everything sexual?"

"Did you ever give foot massages to your friends back in Miami?" I asked.

"No, but they aren't as cute as you." Then, she gave me a big grin.

Whatever. If she really wants to massage my feet, then I'm not going to fight her.

"Mani. Your feet are kind of jacked."

"Well, thanks," I said sarcastically. "I have an excuse. I used to be a dancer."

She gave me a look of intrigue. "Oh. You never told me that. I used to play volleyball and softball in high school."

I chuckled, "I remember half of the softball team at my school being closet lesbians. One was even caught having sex with their female coach in her car after school."

"My coach was male," Lauren began. "We had to stop seeing each other after his wife tried to run me over in the school parking lot."

"Oh, my god! Was she arrested?"

"Yes," she responded. "But, he bailed her out, and she shot him to death."

"How old were you?" I inquired.

"15."

"How old was he?"

"39."

"Oh, my god!" I stated again shocked.

"I felt bad for their three kids. They had to go live with their grandmother, and she was known as the neighborhood drunk. Two of them went to school with me. When they wouldn't stop calling me a whore and a homewrecker every time they saw me, my parents pulled me out pulled me out of the school and put me in an all-girls private school."

"Lauren, this story is horrible."

She sighed, "The good thing is that I didn't have to testify in his statutory rape trial after his murder."

If Lauren intended this to be a romantic night, she just obliterated any chance of that happening.