Melodies of a stranger

Chapter 24

TW: Discussions of death of non-main characters and grieving

Brief mention of neglect

Maxi and Riftan made their way back to the cabin, clinging tightly to each other. They didn't utter a single word. They didn't have to. They both instinctively understood how the other was feeling.

When they reached the cabin, Riftan sat on the sofa and drew Maxi on to his lap. They sat there with their arms tightly wrapped around each other for what seemed like hours, each drawing comfort from the other. Maxi listened to Riftan's breaths, as his hands wandered over her back as if to make sure she was really there.

They held each other as if they were desperately trying to cling to a buoy in a storm. The light outside began to fade and soon they were sat in the dark as night began to descend.

Maxi was the first to move. She shifted her hand, so it was cradling the back of Riftan's neck as she pressed a soft, tender kiss on his cheek. She spoke in a low, cautious voice "Hey, how are you feeling now? Are you ok?"

He stared into the void for a few moments as his mind processed what she had asked. "I'm not ok..." Slowly his gaze turned and met hers, his dark orbs filled with pain. He swallowed before his hand raised to her face as he gently took her cheek in his palm. "...But I have you with me and that means more than I can ever say."

Maxi took his hand in both of hers and leaned into his touch. Riftan's face distorted as the hand that was resting on her back curled into a fist. In an attempt to suppress the rising emotions, he turned his face away from her as he drew several deep breaths.

"What is it? You can talk to me if you want to..."

"Don't worry, it's nothing. It doesn't matter..."

"Riftan, I won't force you, but you may find it helpful to talk to me. Don't forget I've been through a similar thing as you."

He nodded as he thought. "Just... give me a second. I need to get my thoughts in order."

Riftan carefully slid Maxi off of his lap, stood up and began to pile wood into the fire before he bent over to light the kindling. Once the fire had caught, he closed the curtains and began to straighten the cushions on the sofa. Maxi watched him quietly as he looked for any reason to keep himself busy.

It was only when he tried to distract himself in the kitchen that Maxi decided to step in.

"What do you want for dinner? There's steak or I could make some stew? If you don't fancy anything we could drive into town, there's a nice pub which does amazing food."

"Riftan..." He visibly flinched as Maxi called his name. "I'm not going to judge you, and if you tell me to drop it now, I will. But I'm here if you want to talk..."

A look of pure helplessness crossed his features as he stood as still as a statue. Maxi could see that he was biting his bottom lip as he considered what to say.

"It's less that I don't want to talk. It's just... I've never spoken to anyone about her. Not on any meaningful level. Talking about her feels almost... violating. Like it's going to taint my memories of her."

Maxi's eyes grew round. "You've never spoken about her? Have you never spoken to a counsellor?"

Riftan shrugged noncommittally "They tried to send me to one when I went into foster care, but it didn't really work."

"How did you deal with her death?"

"I just did... I got on with it."

Maxi could feel his walls going up. Knowing the importance of talking about this, she wasn't ready to give up quite yet. She decided on a different approach.