Desiderium | Reader x A. Arlert/E. Jaeger/M. Ackermann | SnK

• Shiganshina Sucks • 1

What the hell am I doing

.

You tended to keep to yourself.. most of the time at least.

This habit if yours wasn't necessarily a bad thing. But, it tended to led people to believe you were timid or.. shy. You really weren't. At least, that's what you and your parents thought of yourself, at least. You just knew how to keep to yourself, that's all. Which, might been a bad thing as well. You'd always just.. turn a blind eye to everything around you. Only focused on your own actions.

You held tightly onto your mother's hand, watching her purchase some apples from the market. You made sure to keep your eyes forward, towards the cart, not wanting to take in the bustling environment anymore than you had to. It was too loud, way too crowded, and overall just.. overwhelming. It's not like you could complain though, you were the one who wanted to come along to the market anyway.

In your free hand you held out a basket, which your mother promptly plopped a couple apples in before walking towards another cart, you in tow. She never said much, your lack of words and overall social skills probably came from her influence if we're completely honest here. Your father, on the other hand, was the most expressive out of the two of you. Which is where you got your talkative side. It was kind of like an involuntary switch you had. Only turning on when you were around certain people. Which, at the moment, that was only your own parents.

You let out a small sigh as you peeked over the bread cart the two of you had stopped at. Only being seven at the time, you were practically hidden amongst the crowd, which also meant it was easy for you to get lost. So, you always tried to make yourself as visible as possible or, like right now, you'd hold onto someone's hand.

Your mother never minded though, she'd learned to operate with only one hand a long time ago thanks to your habit. You tugged at her hand a bit, noting that she wasn't doing anything important except waiting for the merchant to be done with another customer. Her eyes trailed down to you, showing you'd caught her attention, "Mom! Are we almost done?" You asked, your voice spoke louder than you'd intended, it was probably just because you took in the fact of how loud your surroundings already were. If you'd been any quieter, your voice would've been drowned out.

"Just a bit longer." She reassured, turning her attention back up to the merchant.

You bit the inside of your cheek, knowing that 'a bit longer' meant around half an hour in mom language, and tightened your grip on the basket in your hands. "Well.. then, can I go back home then?" You questioned, but you were only answered with a mere glance.

You couldn't really tell if it a was a 'No' or 'Yes' based on the look in her eyes. So, you waited, staring up at the women who seemed to be thinking as she picked up a loaf of bread. You lifted the basket towards her, thinking she wanted to set the loaf inside. But, instead, she let go of your hand, using it to grab the object from your grip. You immediately brightened up at her, which she returned with a soft smile, giving you that final look you needed.

"Cool! Thank you! I'll see you soon!" You grinned, waving viciously as you broke out into a sprint, weaving throughout the carts and people who occupied the market area. It was relieving to say the least, standing there with nothing to do for so long.. running like this was the only way you could really exert your built up energy. You bumped into a few adults on your way, almost tripping over your own two feet multiple times.. but soon, you made it out. And, it was just like, everything ended.

All of a sudden, you were away from all the noise. No more carts. No more villagers practically shoulder to shoulder.. it was quiet. You looked around, a soft smile on your face when you realized you were beside the river where boats would come in from Wall Maria. Nobody really went near the water over here. Mostly kids. It was considered dangerous, thinking you'd slip into the water or something.