Him.

3 days later.... Asshole

December 9th, 2014

3 days ago I broke up with the guy I really really like and was then determined to get him back. Why was I? Well here's what happened.

That day when I saw his ex standing next to him and talking to him was the day I knew we we're not going to last, for the simple fact that his ex was there .. and when we went out during the summer once we broke up I was cut off, and couldn't even be near him without him giving me a dirty look. I stood there for a little bit waiting for my mom and said bye to everyone when she finally showed up to get me. when I got home he texted me and it said I got to be honest....

My heart sank to my stomach cause I thought I knew exactly what was coming up next. So I said I have to tell you something too, and he told me to go first. I broke up with him.. I told him that it just wasn't right and we were better as friends to top it all off I sent him a fucking quote from nemo, that read

"It's not that I don't like, it's because I like you I don't want to be with you."

Dumbest shit I have probably ever done cause he replied with, "wow.. that actually really hurt." And was serious!! It takes a lot to hurt him and the fact that I did hurt him like I did killed me. I didn't go to school the next day cause I started getting sick. it was Tuesday. Slept all day Wednesday and Thursday. Didn't go back to school until Friday. Durung those three days I was upset cause everyone calling me and asked me why I broke up with him. I told them all the same thing, it's complicated he was going to break up with me anyways. until the day before I went back to school, when a close friend called me and asked. Of course I told her everything and she was like.. you know he wasn't going to break up with you, he was just gonna say that he loves you.

Well...SHIT! I am probably the biggest fucking asshole in the world. he was literally one text away from saying I love you and I just broke up with him... i am truly an asshole. I remember denying it and saying that can't be right cause after I broke up with him he said yea i was getting there. Theenn felt like an even bigger asshole when she said yea he only said that cause you just broke up with him, what is he supposed to say. So we hung up so I could mourn the death of every single strand of smarts I had in my body. After having a little mini meltdown, taking my 7th nap of the day, I came up with a plan. I got him back once, why can't I do it again?? I got up the next morning and did my make up, attempting to not look as sickly as I was. I got into school in a good mood until one of my bestfriends stopped me, and told me his ex had a hickey that was obviously given to her by him. I gave up after that cause I knew I fucked up and as you could see in the last chapter began trying to forget him again. Yes all of this happened in the time span of 3 days. And yes.... I'm only 15. fucked up? Also a yes, but is he worth it?.... Not sure yet...