My Life Upside Down

Chapter Eighteen

Andrew and I seemed to fall back into our normal routine.

I wasn't ready for a step in our relationship that he was, and he respected that. Of course, it didn't help my desire for him to know that he cared about my boundaries. It was different to be with someone where I wasn't just following the steps of what was supposed to come next for us, but instead what we wanted next. I knew at some point I'd face the same problem but for now, I avoided situations where it was even an option.

The school had settled out from talking about Andrew dating the new girl, and Tawnya seemed to keep her distance from us. I did as Terra asked and made sure to not flaunt my relationship with Andrew, not that she would've known. Terra was so consumed with Chad that I barely saw her if I didn't make a plan. That's what I did the night of Chad's party. I invited her over to my place to get ready.

"What about this?" I handed Terra a tank top of mine.

"Do you think Chad will like it?"

I felt my brows furrow. "Does it matter?" I started to look through my sweaters. "Do you like it?"

"It's cute but I want Chad's jaw to drop when he sees me," Terra handed me the shirt back.

"Okay."

Terra jumped up from my bed and began to look through my shirts herself. She pulled out a cropped orange t-shirt that my parents had gotten me for my birthday. An attempt to try and show that they were okay with me being like every other teenager completely missing the fact that orange was not my colour.

"Chad really liked my orange sweater the other day," Terra held the shirt up to herself.

"If you like it." I shrugged. "I won't even be upset if you don't return it."

"Perfect!"

Terra excitedly left my room to go change in the bathroom. I sat down on my bed and let out a sigh. As nice as it was to get ready with Terra, our whole conversation revolved around Chad. She used to not care what others thought of her and now she was dressing to please him.

I looked at myself in the mirror and wondered if I were any different. Sure my ripped jeans and striped off-the-shoulder shirt were something I had worn countless times that year, but Andrew did once tell me that he liked this combo. Was I dressing for me or him?

Terra came back to the room beaming. "Okay, this is perfect!"

"I'm glad."

"You okay?" Terra shoved her original shirt into her backpack.

"Yeah," I lied. I didn't want Terra to know that her new personality courtesy of Chad wasn't as appealing as the girl I met in September. She was the first and only friend I'd ever really had, well outside of James.

Terra fell back onto my bed. I sat down beside her.

"You really like him huh?"

Terra looked at me. "Rori, I think I'm in love."