The Long Fall

two

"Qiqi, are you looking for a death wish? What did I say about knocking?" Tao said, glaring at me once we got into his room.

Dinner was awkward, but neither of us explained it to the parents, so it was quiet. As soon as we both finished, he grabbed my arm and dragged me into the room, calling me that awful nickname I hated so much.

"I told you not to call me that! I hate it, and you know it!" I replied, tears already falling as I spoke. His face relaxed, realizing what he'd done, and he released his grip on my arm, pulling me into a hug.

"I'm, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. It slipped out because I was angry. You know I don't think you're unlucky." He whispered, brushing back my hair in an attempt to calm me down.

The unlucky nickname came from my birthday, July seventh. Qiqi, a homonym with the words for a funeral mourning period. Classmates who liked to bully tormented me with that nickname in primary school, and Tao always protected me from it, though he teased me as well. To make it luckier, my birthday was always celebrated on the eighth, to insight good fortune. But it didn't help that my father died the day I was born, cementing the fact that I was truly an unlucky girl.

"Sheng'er." I looked up to meet his eyes, so full of worry and regret. "I'm sorry. I know I promised to never call you that again, and I know I messed up, but can you not remain silent when you're mad? It scares me."

"I'm sorry. I, I was just thinking about my dad." I whispered, sighing a bit as I pulled away from the hug. I wiped my tears and then looked around, trying to change the subject. "Are we going to use the usual sleeping positions?"

"Of course. You'll get the bed and I'll sleep on the floor." He replied, smiling a bit to try to ease the tension.

After his parents bid us good night, I hopped into bed and wrapped myself up, not even bothering to finish my assignments. I flipped to face the wall, not wanting to look at Tao at the moment. I was too embarrassed from earlier.

"Ya, Sheng'er." I sighed when he whispered, even going through the effort of kicking the bed and making me look at him. "Will you be okay if I leave Qingdao?"

"Where would you go? Beijing? Shanghai? Only the best of colleges, right?" I asked, chuckling a bit since I found his question silly. I shut up when he looked serious, a rare sighting from the boy. "What do you mean? Where are you going?"

"The next phase of training to be a singer," he paused to make sure I was alright. "The next phase is to be transferred to South Korea."

My jaw dropped in shock. My heart sank in disappointment. But I still did my best to be excited for him.

"Really? Do you, do you even know Korean? I thought you were studying English." I managed to stutter out. He sighed before sitting up to look at me better. "When, when are you leaving?"

"Next month. Just before school starts. I'll be finishing my studies there and then debuting." He explained, making me want to cry even more.

"You, you're really leaving?" I asked, earning a sad smile from him. "Can I come with you?"

"Why would you? You speak even less Korean and English than I do." He answered, chuckling a bit. "And, besides, you don't know how to sing or dance."

"I've been practicing! I want to be like you!" I replied, a little louder than I'd anticipated. He looked at me in surprise, not realizing how hurt I was feeling that he'd be leaving me behind to go follow his dreams.

I wasn't upset that he was going to debut. I wasn't mad that he'd found a career he was happy in. I was hurt that he didn't see any potential in me to follow in his footsteps. I was sad that he didn't beg me to come with him.

"I, I didn't know." I scoffed a bit. Really? That's all you're going to say?

I laid back down, facing away from him in an act of defiance.

"I'm happy for you, don't get me wrong," I said, taking a breath for courage. "I'm just upset you didn't tell me sooner."

"I'm sorry." He whispered. I heard him shuffling, presumably to lay back down as well.

The week passed by well, the two of us getting over any arguments fairly quickly. We were best friends, so of course we'd forgive one another quickly. I gave my wishes of peace before leaving, heading back to my apartment and greeting my mother with a smile.

"Ma, welcome home!" I said excitedly as I hugged her. She sighed and looked at me with annoyance.

"I heard you got in trouble while I was gone." I winced, knowing I'd get in trouble now that the secret was out. "I was called by your headmaster the day it happened, but why didn't I receive a call from you when you got home? You know better than to keep things from me."

"I forgot to since I was told that I needed to stay with Uncle Huang for the time being." I quickly said, falling to my knees and holding her waist. "I'm sorry, it won't happen again, please don't beat me."

"Why would I ever beat you?" She asked, bending down to meet my eyes with a smile. "I'm merely disciplining my daughter and helping her become a good girl."

I yelped as she slapped me across the face, her manicured nails leaving marks on my cheek. I held the wounded skin in surprise and pain as I looked at her with pleading eyes.

"Ma, please. It wasn't even that big of a problem!" I begged, making her chuckle as she grabbed her belt.