Splitted Self:soul From The Past

A LETTER UNREAD

Life ...its all about finding a reason again to live after losing someone and something precious at every step we take . Its all life tells . to find peace in the chaos .

I met you , i fell for you , you said you are afraid of love but somehow you fell for me . you were brave like the bird that is not afraid to fly in storms  . i started living again , your smile was a new hope everyday . your features had a story hidden in each of them ... you did not find comfortable to tell . you saw them scars ...and i found home in them . Days passed and so did years , we fought but we were strong enough to let the thunderstorms pass through and not let  us stir . I had scars tooo  a past i would not prefer anyone to know about . a past that i nurtured just to let my self breath . I was surviving and I could see monsters sitting on the swings hung through my veins . My blood no more boiled and it was cold . You came like an ocean wave under the charming sunlight on the shore and wetting the sand on my heart . But as the ocean wave , you too meant to go back . You were the storm that led me to peace . Your eyes held the  shooting stars raining down . I was just ground , bare , barren ground , an unending , unfenced feild , without hope , with cracks . your stars lit me on , and you made a home on it , on me , you brought rains , greenery and shade on it , you brought streams and you brought me back to life . You promised me , one night , you would never leave me. Even if you are gone you wont be gone forever . you will always come beack to me . That night was the best of all . I was born again that night when you touched me with your bare skin . your fingers were welvet wrapped around them , and you were more soft then eider's feather  can ever be . we were entangled in each other and you dripped  all over my skin as gumusservi.  You were my moonlight . we were growing adults each day and i was stepping more into you . you were the soft star that shine at night and you made me proud as if  all the enchanting things of this universe are made to praise you . you fit into me as if it was my missing piece .

your grace , stood high above peaks ,unbreakable and pure . sometimes your innocence would mesmerize me as if the first laugh of new born infant and other times your humour would amaze me like skyscrappers do . you captivated me with your fragrence  like of oriental lily that can scent a thousand hearts on a sultry midsummer evening .your eyes had soft pools of honey dripping under the shining sun , That I was afraid to look in , not because i hid anything but I never knew how far would I drawn into them when I get in once . I would keep on staring at you like a prisoner would look to the moon for hours after being set free .we talked and your voice ecoed in my years as if my ears yearned to hear it from millineaums . It was more mesmerizing then loving nightingales singing in unison on the home  coming of their loved ones . your memories keep me warm during cold december nights .

when i see your skin , i see that winters can not be more whiter .

and one dehydrateing day...suddenly , out of the blue ....there i was standing like a disowned lad away from home , no where to go and find peace . i was standing at the verge of drowning .you memories ate me alive and still i had to breath each day . you walked away as if you never were there with me , as if it was only me  standing there, it was only me with our dreams , as if i was a stone and nothing will hurt me . And all that were beautiful moments became regrets to you that you would consider crime .As if i chose the distances . you stabbed me again and again and acted like you were the one bled . You chose the world over me , you thought of their happiness and never heard of mine . I tried untill there was nothing to try for , you gave up at the first step and acclaimed that it was love. Did not you know , the one who could make us meet were us and not your pretty hurting excuses . you attached me like a nerve and then cut me off from you and guess what i was the only one who got stitches. i was treated as if i am disease and you need a cure . each day you came and gave me some more death still kept me alive . Dont stand on my grave and cry now , tell me , how hard was it  for you to choose.? I was alive and you made feel like i need improvements and I died thinking where i went wrong . you could not hear my silence still made me fight from you to have you . tell me now what you got in your hands ? ash bare ash. Does it hurt ? does it burn ? tell me how much truimphed you are now ? Tell me why are you back and want me to talk to you when you were the one who shut  everydoor and window , Ignoring my words and keeping me unattentive . You were like knife sharp and edged. each time i kissed you i was the one wounded . you are here to listen , see this is my rage , i am resting and you are crying but ill not stop you  neither i have breaths to. I died months ago  but i was dead since centuries . go live the chosen world . tell me how happy you are now ? .

Just like south sea pearls , highly valuable but beneath the ocean

Just a chapter apart from story . nothing to do with the story going on . It was a letter i wrote and never sent ...hahaha kidding . I just wanted to shift from the story just a  bid .