NGỌZI

Chapter Six.

ONEROUS;
Burdensome, exhausting, tiring.

Even though I was not happy in marriage, I was lucky my business was flourishing.
My hair salon business soon grew from a small-scale business to one of the top popular hair salons in Douala town where we resided.

I was known for beautifying both men and women to their satisfaction, and I made a fortune out of my business. My business success did not stop me from being a humble and submissive wife to my husband Gozie.

Gozie never allowed me to save my money, he would always order me to hand over all the money I make from my salon business to him and I did oblige without any qualms.

I was young and naive and I believe he made good use of the money we both earned from our different businesses. I believe Gozie invested every single penny I gave him into buying properties in Nigeria because that was our agreement on what the money should be used for.

At least we could start amassing properties now that our marriage is yet to be beautified with children, I suggested to him.

Unknown to me I was lied to and manipulated once again by Gozie. Gozie never bought any lands in Nigeria as he claimed to, rather he spent all the money on his multitudinous girlfriends.

I could have denied him access to my business profits, but he would claim to be the head of the family and thus I should hand over to him every surplus I make from my business.

A decision I oblige to avoid being referred to as an ungrateful woman.

It seemed as though Gozie's access to my business profits made him even more unfaithful. Not a day that I did not receive a call from female friends telling me " Oh! Ngọzi I just saw you Gozie your husband in a " specific" hotel with a lady and just thought it was right for you to know".

Believe me, there is no greater opprobrium than being married to an unfaithful partner. Gozie went from being a cheater to a chronic cheater. His desire for more and more women grows stronger each day.

He did not have a limit to his sexual urges, he even went as far as being sexually intimate with my house helpers the most embarrassing of them all.

To an extent I began to change my house helpers regularly because it is either Gozie had been intimate with them or he made an attempt on them which resulted in the little girls disrespecting me and Gozie.

Imagine sharing your husband with your house helpers, nothing beats this humiliation but Gozie never cared about my feelings instead he remained unashamed.

When I realized that my every attempt to talk Gozie out of his unchaste desires was unsuccessful, I decided to write a letter to my father to inform him of the increased agony his decision brought upon my life. A letter my father read with so much pain in his heart and demanded I end the marriage, but forces greater than my power did not let me hearken to the words of my father.

I could not walk out of the marriage now after five years of tolerance, maybe the birth of a child might change him. I muttered to myself.

Gozie suddenly started traveling back to Nigeria very often. He told me he bought land in the village and that he wanted to start developing it, but that was not the only reason why he was traveling to Nigeria nearly every month end.

No! There is more to this than his frequent traveling back to Nigeria, I said to myself.

Some weeks later after Gozie had traveled to Nigeria, I got a letter from one of my cousins in Nigeria, warning me of what was about to befall me if I did not take action.

The letter only confirmed my intuition and in my cousin's words "Your husband Gozie is planning on impregnating another woman from our village" Hence, this however was not shocking to me as I had seen worse down here in Cameroon.
I muttered, squeezing the letter with a scowling face.

A few seconds later I reopened the squeezed letter and continued reading.

"Sister Ngọzi! Gozie is seeing another woman in Nigeria and she goes by the name Amaka an indigen of Ama-Ezike village Gozie has promised her marriage.

News has it that every time Gozie arrives in the village, the girl's mother would be the one to bring her 18-year-old daughter to Gozie for him to be sexually intimate with her".

What a disgust! I said squeezing the letter again.

Gozie did not dis-oblige to this, on the contrary, he so much welcomed and enjoyed every bit of it. He would even go as far as giving the girl my clothes to put on and allowing her access to my bedroom and properties.

I wrote a letter to Gozie's father complaining about his son's behavior, as Gozie's biological mother was late and he was raised by his father and stepmother. The old man to my surprise was in support of his son's actions and replied to me with...

"Since you got married to my son it is only money you have been able to produce, we did not marry you for money but for children, Since you cannot give him children let someone else do it, and do not even try to disturb my son."

What a father-in-law! I said with a painful smile.

But how would I blame Gozie's father? His not to be blamed here, if my father had not given me out to this immoral man I would not be degraded this much.

Indeed, my life before Gozie was not a bed of roses but at least I still had my dignity, I still walked with my face up, with my pride intact and my heart was at peace. But this is no longer the case, not only did I lose my education and dream career as a lawyer to Gozie I equally lost my sanity.

I started to wish my mother never abandoned me and that I never had to marry Gozie just so I could be free from my stepmother's heart-hardnesses.

As I struggled with these thoughts, I went down on my knees teary-eyed and called on heaven to show me mercy and cleanse this curse from me, or else I put an end to this sorrowful life of mine by myself.