Purposely accidental

Lacey

          Being a new mum is everything I hoped for and more. I watch Nate with wonder and amazement. I helped create this amazing little human. But with that comes the vomit and the epic shits. Yep. Who knew explosive poop could skidmark out a nappy and up the back of his clothes? Not me, that's for sure. He feeds well, so much so that he will keep going past the point of being full. I'm getting to know him a little better and judging when he's ready to pop off the boob.

Oh and the bleeding! The whole no periods during pregnancy was great, but it's like it's saved up for the six weeks postpartum. Like constant flow and the granniest sumo pads known to mankind. They are so huge, like those granny pants that are like adult nappies except it looks like a pad. Yeah no thanks. But they have saved me a bunch, so it is all part and parcel of motherhood. Yay! #glamourlife.

I'm looking forward to my uterus settling down and my body feeling more comfortable. The weirdest feeling post birth was the way my stomach felt. It was all soft and squishy. An empty feeling but with a little bit of bloat? That's the best way to describe it. Either way, weird.

Ash has been great, ensuring I eat right and I'm drinking lots of water. I've started expressing so he does some bottle feeds and it's like I see him falling more in love with Nate every single time. He changes dirty bums and dresses him. He is a wonderful father, as I knew he would be. He went back to work after 4 weeks, so now it's just Nate and I kicking around.

Our friends and parents come around or we go see them regularly which gets me out of the house. I have a tendency to go a little stir crazy if I stay cooped up inside for too long. There is a really great park near our place and I take Nate for walks in the pram.

Jules is over every few days and dotes on Nate like he is her own. When we asked her to be his godparent she cried. Of course she agreed quickly and they have their own little bond. All the girls buy him clothes and fuss over him which is adorable. The guys though, watching them melts my heart. They turn into soft teddy bears around Nate. They don't use bad language around him at all which I figured they would struggle with but they don't. Mostly they talk to him about the future, taking him to see sports live or teaching him how to play.

If I ever had any doubt about the quality of our friendships it died when Nathan was born. Everyone has come together so well, we are one tight unit. A well-oiled machine. They cook dinners for us once a week to help out and it gives me a bit of a break from worrying about having everything up to scratch. The house, the cleaning and trying to look like a functional human rather than scary mummy.

I used to laugh at those tropes about not showering and looking like a mess. How wrong was I! Parenting is hard. Motherhood is hard. It's go, go, go all of the time. There is no off switch. If I sleep when he sleeps, who cleans? So I try to nap sometimes and I try to clean at others. It's not as spick and span as I used to keep it, but it doesn't look like a hovel. Winning at life I know!

I'm at my six week check up and I get good news from the doctor. Everything is healing well and blood flow is slowing. He discusses my options for contraceptives and I elect to go with the mini pill as I can take this while breast feeding. Once I stop that I can change to the pill, shot or the bar I guess. For now, mini pill it is. I'm so excited to surprise Ash with the news. He knew my appointment was coming up but I didn't let him know the date. Sneaky I know!

I call my mum and let her know it's a go ahead for her to have Nate for a few hours. I'm not quite ready for him to have a sleepover yet, but 4 hours I can do. That should give me enough time to make a nice dinner and for Ash and I to have some sexy times. I've bought lube just in case downstairs is different after pregnancy. I've read a lot about it in preparation. Sometimes the body doesn't naturally lubricate itself as much as before and sex can hurt.