War of Thoughts

missing out

when she mentioned him
my heart cramped -
a feeling of jealousy
and missing out.
And when I realised
he had been here this morning
and I had been here a few hours later
it made me hate the concept of time.
Because even tho it might hurt to see him again
I wish I did
because I'd rather see him and feel hurt
than to not see him and feel the gap of missing him.
I wish I could see his golden hair again falling in front of his eyes.
I wish I could hear that laugh and those stupid jokes again.
I wish his eyes would look at me one more time.
And maybe just maybe
I wish his lips would find their way to mine again.