NORTON

A Secret Marriage

CHAPTER 16

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Apostacy. The abandonment or refusal to continue to follow, obey or recognize a religious faith.

An Alimah on television had touched on the subject of Islam believers turning against their religion and Kim learned that Apostacy is one of the reasons spouses were granted divorces in the Islam religion. If a man or women leaves Islam, then the marriage becomes null and void. The couple can no longer be together.

This information brought joy to Kim for only but a few minutes. At this stage, she had decided she would do almost anything to free herself from Ayaan but she was faced with two dilemmas. (i) The idea of finding a new religion seemed like a mission her mind, body and soul didn't want to embark on. Going back to Christianity would be easy but she had already made the mistake of converting to a religion followed by a lover and got burnt. As a devout Christian, Mercy would surely appreciate Kim's return to the faith but Kim felt like it would take her back to having her life rotate around the church. She also didn't think her children would adjust well into a new religion after so many years of being schooled in the ways of Allah. Although Kim had suffered greatly after converting to Islam; the time she had spent meditating and studying the Quran made her realise that she loved the faith without Ayaan. (ii) She had already done the worst thing a Muslim wife could do and yet, Ayaan still refused to talaq. The shame and embarrassment of having a wife who lives with another man should have been embarrassment enough for the Nortons to insist on a divorce but they had surprised her by demanding that she return to her marital home. Suvika had not forgiven her for lying about her to her sons and Kim knew there was no way she had pardoned her for shaming their name by committing adultery. If Kim hadn't lived with Ayaan for so many years, she would be convinced he wants her back only to kill her but her spirit was sure her husband wanted to frustrate the rest of her days on earth as punishment.

She could already see herself locked inside her marital home with nothing but bread and water. Ayaan would probably spend most of his time at her mother's house and only return to make sure Kim was still suffering from boredom and frustration. She would probably be refused to visit her relatives too and labeled a bad influence to her children. Pumla would be married to Kamran quick and the Mina family would most likely join forces with the Nortons in keeping Pumla away from her for fear she might get influenced by her worldly ways. All these thoughts made Kim feel like she was already trapped in her fictional future. She literally shook with fear that caused her to break out in perspiration. Pumla was still at work but in Kim's mind, she was inside a black BMW that was transporting her to a world she would never return from. A place of submission and silence designed for an obedient Muslim wife.

"Oh, Pumla. Oh my child"  the words involuntarily escaped her mouth without instruction from the brain. The sound of the kitchen door shutting close snapped her back to her reality. Mercy's living room was filled with sun light and the television was still set on Eman channel. Pumla appeared from the far end of the lounge and startled Kim again. Her tensed body started to relax, seeing as her child was safe home. Kim held her hand out to her child and Pumla sat next to her mother and embraced her while still holding her hand. "Who told you, mama?" Pumla asked and Kim pulled away to find Pumla's face. "Who told me what?" "You look sad and stressed. I thought you knew about father". Kim recalled how Asim and Asad had died unexpectedly and thought that's exactly what had happened to Ayaan. Her heart raced and her mind jumped from one thought to another. He couldn't have killed himself; that's haram. He surely wasn't sick or ill. The Mawlana would have informed me. "How did it happen?" Kim asked feeling dazed and weak. Pumla looked at her mother like she was questioning her sanity. "Aarbida took dowry to granma's house and the Imam officialized the union. That's how it always happens mama." Kim's threatening feelings of sadness and depression disappeared instantly and she shot to her feet. She knew she had heard correctly but her brain was working hard to conceptualize the information. "Where did you get this information from, Pumla?" Kim asked feeling like the air in the room was thinning.

Zano had been Pumla's best friend since they moved to Low-veld and Kim knew she wouldn't make up a lie then pass it on to her dear friend.

Inbetween resuming her sewing hobby, Kim had kept her promise to Siddiqui byspending more time meditating on Allah's word and seeking his assistance so shecould move forward. The Mawlana was pleased when Kim called him a month aftertheir last meeting to tell him how much peace she had found from reading theQuran again. She decided to call him again. The Mawlana sounded pleasant when he answered Kim's call and asked how her spiritual journey back to the light was going. "It's going!" Kim shot back sounding louder than she had intended. Sensing Kim's anger, Siddiqui coolly asked if everything was okay. "I thought the first wife was an important part in the process of her husband's second marriage".

{And if you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry those that please you of [other] women, two or three or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry only] one or those your right hand possesses. That is more suitable that you may not incline [to injustice] - Quran 4:3

"That's the only law set by the Sharee'ah for a man who wishes to have multiple wives, Kim. No law obliges a man to inform his wife of his plans to remarry if they don't need to. In fact, he may choose to not inform you to protect you".

Kim felt her body shiver from anger and disbelief. "Protect me from what exactly, Siddiqui?!" Kim sputtered in belligerence. "Feelings of distress." Kim shut the line then stomped back to the living room and changed the TV to a circular music channel. She heightened the volume to ten; a number she was adjusting to for the first time since she got married. She then turned and left the room after instructing Pumla to never again tune into religious television of any faith.