Chapter 3

8 1 20
                                    

A/N note: Ignore any spelling errors, i wrote this half asleep.

︎ ˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

Jungkook goes home early that night and Taehyung is stuck with his thoughts. He thinks maybe he freaked him out, that maybe he read the room wrong. That maybe he kisses Jungkook without it being a mutual want. He thinks maybe he was wrong and it wasn't a shared want to kiss. A sinking feeling hits him and he feels sick.

Taehyung had never kissed someone before, and it ended in the other pulling away and saying it was a bad idea— implying. Hes stupid. Stupid for thinking it was a good idea to let his desire take control of him. Stupid for thinking kissing a boy was ever a good idea— let alone his best friend. He fears everything they had was ruined that night, especially when Jungkook doesn't ask to hang out the next day... But when Monday rolls around, everything seems to be fine. Taehyung picks up Jungkook from his house in the morning like normal, and Jungkook gives him a big hug. He even thanks him for opening the door for him like always. His smile, his big bunny  smile, is on display like nothing ever happened.

Taehyung almost thinks he dreamt everything as they drive to school, but when they park at 7:35am, and Jungkook opens his mouth, Taehyung knows he didn't dream it.

"So i was thinking," Jungkook starts, pausing the music that was playing on the stereo. Oh god. "Maybe we should just um- forget about the other night. You know?"

The older feels like silence consumes them then. The chatter of the students flooding into the school and cars pulling in ceases to sound out and Taehyung looks at the younger, stunned. "Um.." He mutters, no words. He's speechless. Forget about it? — He thinks. Jungkook cant be serious... He.. wants to forget it?

"I mean i just, i don't think it was like. You know- the best idea?" Jungkook continues, getting more awkward as he sees the blank stare on Taehyung's face. "I mean i- i didnt not like it- i just think— like i mean our parents if they- if they found out..." Taehyung can tell Jungkook is scared of their parents. Taehyung is too, honestly. He cant imagine what they'd do if they found out. Lord help them, have mercy.

"I understand." Is what Taehyung decides to say, its really all he can say. He does understand. It helps that Jungkook says he didn't hate the kiss. That he didnt hate being close to him, that he doesn't hate Taehyung's lips on his and the pull between them.

"You do?" Jungkook's big eyes seem to get bigger as he looks at him, thankful and relieved.

"Yeah, i do." Taehyung nods, solemn inside but knowing it'll be better to just forget it. Especially when Jungkook smiles in relief. Its better to forget what they had, the moment, the feeling, the whole situation. Go back to normal.

Its better that way. Right? — In any sense.. That doesn't stop them from getting close to kissing more times after that. It was a irresistible pull.. something Taehyung cant explain. The way he just always seemed to find his eyes on Jungkooks lips— and vice versa. It was effortless.. and so was leaning in.

Maybe it was the fear of their parents finding out, or their peers, or the wrath of Jesus Christ and the Lord that really got to them, and made them pull away. But in any way, they kept pulling away, and awkwardly starting up a different conversation, or turning up the movie, or music or whatever sound they could to drown out the thoughts of kissing each other.

It didn't make it go away though. And thats how they got to the big conversation about what to do with it all, a little over 2 months later:

"How about this," Taehyung sparks up, sitting on the floor with the younger as they brainstorm without realizing that they both are thinking about the same thing.

"What?" Jungkook queries, interested in his best friends thoughts.

"How about, we experiment once. We.. we do what we want for one night." Taehyung speaks as he looks at his sock that has bears all over it that Jungkook got for him. Said they were perfect since he's — Taehyung's — his little Taebear. Jungkook nods along. "And we just let ourselves get carried away— and then never do it again."

Taehyung doesn't know what made him think this was a solid plan, but it definitely had something to do with the way Jungkook nodded assuringly, agreeing strongly. Jungkook was always a huge ego booster for his older friend.

"Yeah- like once and never again." Jungkook agrees verbally, adding to the thought.

Taehyung smiles. "Yeah."

And thats how it all started.

To Be Continued...

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