It was startling, just how silent an entire school of hormonal teenagers could be, but they were just that, silent. Craig Tucker, tucked neatly away into his friend group was perhaps, for the first time in his life, truly driven speechless. What was there to say? Clyde was the first to break the silence, "Oh my god, is that Tweek Tweak?" He said, watching the black clad boy stumble into the cafeteria, the goths hoarded around him like knives, poised to strike.
Craig raised his eyebrows, surprise written so clearly on his usually stoic face. It was a sight he never thought he'd see, something he never thought hed have to worry about. The grimy goths got their guts all over him, black and gooey and gross, and weirdly enough- despite the sense of style being grotesque on every level of gore-ish gross, it didnt look terrible on him. The one thing he was grateful for, was they had not managed to talk the blonde into getting rid of golden locks- yet.
"...Oh god- I told you guys this was a-nng- a bad idea, but no one ever listens to me- and will..." he gulped, "will I have to drink blood now? Oh god, am I gonna live forever? Thats so much pressure I can barely handle living now!" He confided in Pete, worrying his hands. "For the last time, we're goth. Not vampires. Vampires are just posers and wanna be goths," Henrietta rolled her dark eyes.
Craig clenched his jaw, and his hands balled into fists. Yes, he was glad to see Tweek making friends, but fucking goths? The emo losers that dreamed about death and made out with creepy ass spiders for a living? He took a deep breath. He wasnt gonna bother Tweek again. Hed made it clear they needed nothing from each other except distance. Craig could give him that. When the cafeteria quit holding its breath, and chatter continued, his table forgot why it was frightened in the first place.
"Im so excited for your party this weekend, Token. Theres gonna be tons of food and tons of booze, right? Craig, arent you excited?" He asked, giving him that signature doughy smile. Craig wasnt listening. Two days before a party that he didnt wanna go to. He didnt like the people anyways and the beer could cost 400 bucks and it'd still taste like horse piss smelled. Besides, he was preoccupied. Tweek was... smiling, and laughing. It was like a breath of fresh air in his smokers lungs.
"Dude, are you listening?" Clyde asked, unsure why his friend was so zoned out. When the goths left, taking Tweek with them, Craig watched a paper fall from Tweeks notebook, and casually got up. He stretched and walked over, picking it up and leaving the cafeteria in silence. When he was away from his friends, he glanced at the paper, curiously.
Its hard to believe they like me, it has to be a joke. Maybe Im part of a weird social experiment, they don't need a spare tire, a fifth wheel. What am I doing? But to feel wanted is such an odd feeling, and its warm like an embrace. Today has been a day of odd miracles or maybe they are curses. A touch from a long forgotten hand, and social acceptance in a group of people my age. Times are changing and Im afraid that if they change back to before, I will break. I didn't recognize it before, this overwhelming emptiness, the beast of the lonely hath swallowed me whole and consumed so much of me that in a few more bites, there will be nothing left. Craig-
He stopped reading, so many things swirling in his mind. Why was his name in this? Did Tweek still think about him? He was talking about Craig comforting him earlier, wasn't he? And who said hath anymore? He glanced down to read the next line,
Craig Tucker, I hate you.
His breath caught in his throat, and his eyes scanned the next line, unnerved anticipation boiling in his gut with the wrong sense of butterflies. He was gonna be sick. Fuck, of course Tweek hated him. Why did that bother him so much? Why did it get under his skin?
Why can't you just be mean to me? Why cant you just leave me alone? I damned you to the hell of my closet, folded you away in stupid diary after diary and you still haunt me like the very ghost of my past that you are. I hate myself, and so do you but you are so kind to me still. I hate you.
Craig gripped it, expression an uncanny mirror of how sick he truly felt. He was the worst human in existence. Was he what made Tweek so lonely? Surely not.
I exiled all the thoughts and fears and memories and dreams of you to flimsy printer paper- the only thing that would hear what I had to say, I exiled you like everyone exiled me. When you cast me aside, I cast you in paper and pen, and everyone forgot who I was and I became a freak. I am a freak. I hate you, Craig Tucker. So why do I have-
"That's mine!" Tweek gulped, snatching it from his fingers. He glanced up, tanned face a strange shade of red and green and white all at once. Tweeks alabaster skin was fanning flames, and he avoided eye contact as he got his paper and vanished down the hall so fast that he didn't have time to react. He watched him disappear, his black clad figure vanishing like the grim reaper, after killing his soul without him even understanding why or what exactly had happened. He looked around, the bell must've rang, people were in the halls, and Token and Clyde waited for him at his locker with curious looks. He swallowed, making his way over. So that was just it. Tweek hated his guts.
YOU ARE READING
Leaves (Creek) (South Park)
أدب الهواة(Point of view changes to get a better understanding of each characters thoughts and actions.) Why do I still think of you, when I wrote you away?
