Don't Regret...

Chapter 19

~Niall's pov~

I wanted to kiss her so badly. I did. I kissed her last second of the interview. I didn't know what came over me it was like I had to kiss her.

Sadly, I told her it 'was just to make it oblivious we are dating for real'. That's what a jerk would say. Oh what I mess I am. What a jerk I am more likely. However, when I told her that she looked upset and mostly disappointed. I wish if I didn't said that. It broke my heart knowing she is upset from me.

I don't understand this feeling I have. I should be upset that she wanted to use us (my band mates and I) to gain more fans. Yet I am happy. Why am I happy? This is confusing!

You know what else hurts? It hurts to know she is quite insecure about herself. She looks down sometimes with a sad smile, but quickly covers it by holding her head high like she owns the place with a fake smile. I know when someone lies and when someone tells the truth. As I could see it in their eyes. There is something unique about her. She isn't afraid of anything as she is good at hiding.

I wanted to make up for what I said to her yesterday. Yes I know it isn't such a big a deal, but I want to. I cooked scrambled eyes with toast and poured in orange juice in a cup. I took it to her room set it on the drawer beside her.

Cautiously, I shook her by holding her shoulders. Slowly, she fluttered her eyes open. She looked up at me with a smile that made my heart swell.
"Good morning or should I say good afternoon sleepy head" I giggle
"Good morning/afternoon Niall" Emily giggled back. Oh her giggles were too cute and innocent.
"I made you breakfast" I show her
"Oh thank you." she smiled and looked down as if no one ever did anything like this for her.
"I want to take you out today Emily" I smile looking at her.
"What Simon told you so" she hisses.
Which I get caught of guard. Her mood, swings very fast.
"Yes. He did. Get ready" I hiss back. What no I didn't mean that. Simon actually didn't tell me to take Emily out today. Well she isn't the one who is short tempered too...

After an hour (it's 2pm now) Emily is ready. As she walked down the stairs she sent me a look- oh if looks could kill I would be dead by now. I just wanted to take her out to relax and speak but no I had to ruin it by speaking back shit. Lets hope I could redeem myself...

I took her to the place we went when I asked her to be 'my girlfriend'. I set out a picnic place on the spot of the same place we sat that day. I looked at her to see her reaction she looked quite guilty, but she covered up her emotions as usual.

We laid on the picnic cover; our arms crossed behind our heads. We laid on our sides looking at each other.
"I know Simon didn't set this up Niall"
"I thought you would have never believed me"
"I'm just not a really morning person I'm sor-sorr I apologise Niall."
"I should be apologising for lying Emily."
"What do you mean?"
"I didn't mean what I said yesterday. I kissed you because I wanted to. I can't stand it just looking at you without kissing you is hard. Also for this morning for hissing back at you for no reason." I explain feeling quite relieved yet there was something missing.
"Oh" was all she said. It did hurt that she didn't give me a proper reply.
"It's hard to take all this in Niall. As I am not one to love." She simply explained.
"I want us to tell the truth to each other Emily no more lying." I compromise
Her eyebrows furred.
"It depends Niall." Well that's better than nothing.
"Depends on what Emily?" I ask
"On your questions" Again she simply replied

"Well I don't know much about you so what's your favourite colour?" Really Niall favourite colour? Smooth going Niall.

"Wow ok I wasn't expecting that but it would be black" She raised her eyes brows

"That doesn't really count as a colour" I object.

"Yes it does but now it's my turn to ask you a question. What's your favourite colour?" She grinned.

"It is green" she scrunched up her face saying
"That's not a nice colour"
"What? Don't judge the colour" I cross my arms on my chest and pout.
"Aww poor baby. Don't pout you're too cute like that." She realised what she said. Quickly she put her hand on her mouth and her eyes were wide open.

"Hey it's ok thanks for calling me cute. Although I think you are very pretty" I poke her nose.
She giggled with pink tinted cheeks.

"My turn. Can I be a bit personal?" I ask for her approval. Hesitantly, she nodded her head.

"What has happened in your past Emily?" Cautiously I ask...