A Reddie Fanfic: More than Friends

Part 5 Eddie

Why was he so angry that Richie had a girlfriend??

I'm just jealous he has a girlfriend before I do.

"Eddie! What's wrong?? You seem upset." Beverly had followed him outside to the street.

She patted a bench and they both sat down.

"Bev, are you and Bill in love?" Eddie asked without even thinking.

He was not in love with anyone so it was a stupid question.

"Ya. I mean I think so. We haven't said it yet but I love him. Why?" Beverly asked.

"I think I might love someone." Eddie whispered just realizing it himself, "But they won't feel the same because well they have a girlfriend."

Beverly looked shocked and Eddie could tell she knew who he was talking about. Bev embraced Eddie in a hug as he began to cry.

"Bev, I-I don't know what to do!" Eddie sobbed.

"Eddie, I don't know what to tell you. I'm I don't have any great advice but I think you should talk to him. I mean that girl is insane. He literally just met her today. I don't think she really means anything to him." Beverly tried to tell him.

Eddie nodded and stood up, "Thanks Bev."

Eddie still had hours until his mom would be home but he had no idea what to do to fill the time. Usually he would go over to Richie's but that wasn't an option anymore. Everything had changed now. He could never look at Richie the same.

I can't be in love, Eddie told himself over and over but it was use. He was helplessly in love with his best friend, Richie Tozier.

Eddie biked all the way home thinking about what to do. Once he was there he thought about Beverly's advice.

"Talk to him," She had said.

Eddie went over to the phone and dialed in Richie's number. No one picked up but he left a voicemail anyways.

"Rich, you and I have been friends for so long. I don't know why but I really hated seeing you with that girl. Maybe it's because I wish I could have a girlfriend too or you know maybe it's because I wish I could be that girl. No, I don't wanna be a girl. I-I-I just mean that I want to be with you. I want to be more than friends with you. I'm sorry, that sounds really stupid. Anyways you probably won't even here this but whatever. Oh and in case you didn't recognize my voice its me, Eds."

It sent.

That's when Eddie regretted it.

"NO! NONONONO! I DID NOT JUST DO THAT!" Eddie screamed, tears coming to his eyes.

He left his house and biked to Richies. Maybe he can delete the message before Richie heard it. He ran up the stairs and all the way to Richie's room. He stopped on the doorway hearing his own voice.

"I want to be more than friends with you. I'm sorry, that sounds really stupid. Anyways you probably won't even here this but whatever. Oh and in case you didn't recognize my voice its me, Eds." The speaker played.

Richie stared with a blank expression on his face.

Eddie was frozen in place not knowing what to do.

"Eddie?" Richie said walking closer.

"I have to go."

Eddie ran out the door wanting to die. He had ruined his friendship. It was the best thing that he had and now it was ruined. Eddie biked home, ran up to his room and cried. The hours passed by and soon his mom was home.

"Eddie Bear!!!! I'm home!!!"

"Hi Mommy! I'm coming for my meds!" Eddie mer his mom down stairs who was holding a new fannypack.

Eddie swallowed all the placebos and went back to his room. Eddie couldn't deal with the pain anymore. Richie hated him. He had every right to. If he was being honest he hated himself too. Lifelessly he walked to the bathroom and grabbed a shaving blade. He slowly walked back to his bedroom.

Slowly Eddie dragged the blade across his wrists. Blood poured out everywhere and Eddie felt woozy. A knock sounded on Eddie's window and as he dizzily saw who it was everything went black.