(Can't) Let You Go

End of a Beautiful Start

It has been over a year when I met Yoori at mental hospital. Despite of what she had done in past I pity her. Looking at her condition getting worse made me feel bad. It was her parent's ignorance that she never got treated at the early stages. Now, it became part of her life. Meeting Yoori was finally the end of a beautiful start of our friendship. Da Ri was also under mental therapy session after everyone came to know that she was the one who supported Yoori. 

Things have not been same for me since then. Even though time has passed but the trauma was still alive. It lives in me everyday like a parasite trying to eat me within. Since one year I got extreme amount of support from the people who love me. My seven  boys were always around me. Taehyung who finally accepted my feelings for him without giving any clue was the my biggest support. 

No matter where, he takes me by his side. In the beginning it was very difficult for me to go to places with him. But one day he suddenly grabbed my hand and since then he had never let it go. I was always by his side from his tours to performances to guest visits. Fortunately, no one ever noticed me since Taehyung used to grab all the attention along with other celebrities. No matter how long he stays by my side or one day suddenly leave me, I will always wonder and ask the same question to myself..... 

Why did he start liking me?

Why a common person like me got fortunate enough to spend some beautiful moments of life with her only love?

I don't have anything like a celebrity, then why I got chosen?

Is god real?

I still need answer to many questions in which last one will remain a mystery. From my perspective, god is real and he helped me.

I still sometimes ask the first question to Taehyung indirectly hoping one day he will reply with real answer. But he always says : 

"We have never got a little manager before, you were the first. I like rare things"

Duh! I know he is never going to answer seriously.

All seven members have reduced the group activities and started working on solo projects. Because of which I get less time to spend with others.

All of us have started living separately except V. Yes, we live together. Like I said, once he had held my hand and never let it go. I still remember the time when I told my parents that I was working for BTS from past three years and not as a software engineer in Seoul. They were shocked. They started thinking of me as a celebrity, which I am definitely not. Even if by chance one day I come on television standing somewhere behind V, no one is going to point me out. So, I am completely protected. 

Sometimes I think, is this a dream which will end once I wake?

Is everything that I am living part of a god's movie?

Will everything end up the next day I open my eyes?

The start of this was unexpected. Will the end also be unexpected? It feels like a movie where a common girl suddenly crosses path with world famous celebrities and start involving in their lives. Will it end like a movie? If yes, a happy ending or sad?

No matter what happens in life ahead. It will be impossible to forget this precious part of my life. I want to stop time. I want to pause everything.

Currently,  I am sitting on the couch next to love of my life, his head on my shoulder. He is relaxing while I am writing down my life experiences. How an unexpected turn my life took. Seoul was only a dream but it became my destiny. Taehyung was and will ever be my only love.

On the last lines of my book, I would like to walkthrough my journey again.

In the beginning, I was just a normal college girl who got messed up life due to past. I got my comfort by watching BTS which in turn became my love unknowingly. Seeing Taehyung was just a mere dream. BTS came to India for the first time. I got involved with them after a tragic incident. I met them! I lived with them! They started liking me. We became close. Then they left. I was destined to be with them. No matter how many hardships I faced, we were finally united. Now we are all together.

Currently, having Taehyung next to me feels special. Writing our final conversation :

"Hey!! Since one year I have been seeing you writing something! What have you been writing down?", said Taehyung raising his head off my shoulder.

"Ahh!! It's a secret!!", I replied.

"Tell me your secret then! I am a great secret keeper", he stood up from the couch trying to grab my notes.

"No!!!! Don't !!!...don....don't Taehyung!!", I said as I started running towards the kitchen.

He followed me till the kitchen door and then stopped suddenly. He knew there was no place for me to escape. It was his win.

"Okay, I will not chase you if you tell me what do you keep on writing?"

I sat on the kitchen floor still holding my book tightly in my hands while he stood casually next to the kitchen door taking support from the wall.

"You want to know?", I asked.

"Yes", he replied.

"Not now!"

"Why?"

"I will show you when the right time comes."

"And when will this right time come?"

"I don't know.....you will know my little secret then only"

"Haha!!! Okay! I will not chase you more. I know you will show me yourself!"

He will know once the right time comes.

Closing my book until he opens to read.

THE END.

[A/N]

BORAHAE!!!!!!!!!!!!