Dear Elena
"When morals decline and good men do nothing, evil flourishes. A society unwilling to learn from past is doomed. We must never forget our history"
~j. Edgar Hoover
How are you doing I'm just telling you that you have a boyfriend now that you're probably gonna regret for the rest your life and spoilr alert you will. He was a ugly son of a bitch very ugly I am usually a image positive person and a very very positive person but he wasn't the most nicest looking guy I'm not saying tattoos or piercings I'm just saying he wasn't used to pretty boy for you and he was to get more than hell let's put it that way. I remember when he first cheated on you and I'm gonna tell you it's gonna hurt like a bastard there is no ibuprofen or opium or anything else that's going to help you get out of the house you're going to have to go to therapy for this I know that and in all due respect you had to go to therapy because of this. And I'll tell you this is why he was cheating on you it hurt like a bastard the first time do you know any with a nerdy girl that was someone who was not very pleasant to you in the first place and wasn't very nice to you so that should've been a hint that he wasn't gonna be good for you I still remember her showing her parts off to him in the hallway and you were angry and you told your friend cash. Cash was very good at first about this but then she ended up going around saying stupid shit like let's have a holy war and stuff like that which didn't really help your shit in life you had to go to therapy for a while I remember 10 years until you want to Robertson house that you ended up having to be in therapy for quite some time. Not just because of your problems as a baby but also because of your problems as a teenager I remember you when you found out Tess was hurting you emotionally that she was going to pay for what she did and you let your anger spell out completely I remember that day because she was shivering in the corner and crying for the rest of the day in that same classroom you had confronted her I don't usually suggest bullying but this case this was the only way you had to do it but it wasn't very fun to do it wasn't no and he ended up learning a very bad lesson from the word shows that anger was a good use to get all your point across which is not the case. Instead trying to use other ways of using your anger instead of just belting it out. There are other ways you're going to do this I remember spoiler alert that you ended up on Wattpad and that you have now become a good author and stuff now because of your anger you've turn yourself around quite a bit if I remember correctly it took you 10 years but it got in 10 years to get it through your head you didn't have to do any crime time or anything like that I remember that for a fact because you weren't that kind of a person that was that aggressive universe verbally aggressive at the time I remember you still using your anger towards cash to go about making a beautiful painting of a cockpit with flowers on it for the victims of 9/11 if I remember correctly airplane cockpit if I remember correctly and you ended up being rewarded for that and you didn't want the reward I remember you saying. Instead he told the person to give to a charity that cater to the 9/11 victims instead of giving it to you. That's when you realize that you were lucky enough that you're still alive from your encounter with terrorism instead of dealing with yes you were dealing with creativity the way your parents were supposed to teach you in the first place and they did succeed. I know you're going to lose your father pretty soon you already lost your mother and plenty a goldfish and hedgehogs over the years but I'm gonna tell you you're going to make it through surviving this shit. Will you ever be the same person because you blowing your stack at tears and then ended up having to say stupid stuff no you're not gonna be the same but you will be a lot better in the end I'll tell you that for a fact you're going to learn about compassion and kindness and decency and will be a human once again you're not gonna be perfect as all humans are not perfect and you been diagnosed with PTSD not because of your idiot boyfriend cheating on you but because of your past as in when you went through as a baby and as you were bullied in elementary school as well. And you survived PTSD if I remember a Batman movie spoiler alert I remember you going to a Batman movie with the Robertson crew going to see Batman and you were waiting for someone to eat their lunch and then someone said how do you beat your PTSD once it's gone it's gone until something else stupid happens again and I am hoping that for the next I don't know how long I'm going to live you will not have to deal with any more stupidity. These are words of encouragement that you were going to be needing for a while not does fidelity bravery integrity but compassion kindness and caring as well that's gonna be a little hard pill to swallow but it's going to get you somewhere in life. Also you're going to be meeting a lot of celebrities I'm not talking about iron maiden I'm talking about Theo von Sanjay as well as other people that have had PTSD and use a way to get out of it by doing creative stuff like singing or writing if you remembered that Chatham Tatum. I think I remember spoil her to Chatham Tatum taught you about the Amazon publishing opportunities that you didn't know about you last year and now you're flourishing because of it. Thanking about this life hasn't been so bad so far but I'm just gonna tell you high schools a bitch and a shit show but life's a dope show if you let me just think about trying to be more kinder to people I will be the dope show and share the shit show. And another thing you're going to learn when you grow older is that you learn how to get a higher pain tolerance by deep breathing or just cursing either way you just try to help yourself through it and you will be a lot better just read your way or curse your way out of the thing and then you'll be fine but try not to use it on people does use it on the pain instead.
Your friend Elena
YOU ARE READING
fidelity bravery integrity | letters to my self
Teen FictionI was inspired by some thing I saw on Wattpad something there was about writing a letter to when you where going to your first day of high school. And this intrigued me very much so I thought this would be a good idea to do some my self.
