To Rebuild a Mageocracy

One

^^ Muradin, Deity of Magic ^^

— Nonith —

A portal opened in a black cell made of volcanic glass and mithril ore, pouring out into it the soul of a young woman in a comfy cotton onesie, looking incredibly confused by this whole situation while two beings, one faceless and one stone, appeared above the cell, staring down into it.

Muradin was the first to speak, seething with rage and contempt for this mortal who would ruin a project eighty billion years in the making. "Who are you, Mage? Who is your Teacher? Who gave you the Art of Magic? Answer me my Questions Three, and you may indeed go Free; Lie to me, and Doomed you will be."

The confused woman looked around, finding no source for the voice, but decided internally that she'd fallen asleep at her desk and was dreaming of a typical DnD Challenge setting. After a deep breath, she nodded and spoke clearly into the void. "My name is Laura Morgana D'Artagnan, my Teacher is Master Craftsman Sunhorn of the Harvard University Dungeons and Dragons Circle, and I suppose the Art of Magic was designed and given to the world by the legendary Gary Gygax, the first Dungeon Master?"

There was a silence, as the deities above the woman sensed her thoughts, her memories, and halted their rage in its tracks as something became clear: Magic wasn't Real. In this woman's mind, Magic was a children's story, a game to play with, never real. She was convinced she was dreaming, and they were going to ask her three questions and then give her three rewards for answering honestly. The shift in their demeanors was instant, and Muradin placed their face in their hands slowly, a feeling of shame filling the godly space around them. In the human's mind, however, there was a realization happening; she was looking down through her hands, and the void around her was starting to feel more and more real, no longer like a dream. She could feel it, and that meant this wasn't a dream.

Muradin tried to steamroll the conversation along, awkwardly. "Ah... good... you answered truthfully, so... I guess... you get a prize? Uhm..."

Stone Eye cleared his throat, assisting swiftly the stunned deity. "A new life, aye, that's the first gift, yes! And the second is Magic, eh? The third... what would you like for the third?"

Laura looked upwards finally, finding both of them floating there, and surprised the both of them by putting her fists on her hips and glaring up at them sternly. "Now who told you boys that it was okay to talk down to people like this? Come on down here, NOW!" A sheepish looking stone man and pale silhouette appeared before her, in human heights, neither of them looking directly at her, and she snorted dismissively. "Look at you, both of you know what you did wrong, don't you?!? Huh?!? Speak!!!"

"Ah, Uhm, well, you-"

"I didn't-, that is, you-"

"ME, nothing!!! WHERE IS MY FUCKING BODY?!?" Her screech silenced both of them, making them shuffle their feet awkwardly like siblings in front of a broken vase and a pissed-off mother. Their silence only made her rage spike higher, and she repeated herself slowly, at full volume. "WHERE!!! IS!!! MY!!! FUCKING!!! BODY?!?!?"

"... Gone."

"Gone? As in, you lost it, or it no longer exists?"

"... it... no longer exists..."

"Oh? And why is that, Hmm?" Laura crossed her arms and glared, seething, down at the slowly shrinking deities.